Imperfectly Perfect

11. The Mess.

Mishti.

Chaos. That is what it is.

I just lead him on, it was all my fault. I let him to kiss me yesterday and the worst, I was equally involved in it. I could resist him no longer. Seeing him after so many days has only intensified my feelings. I was literally missing him very bad and then he had to make an entry out of no where suddenly with a super cute present and not so good wounds. While processing it, I was mortified by my own panic even toward a slightest of discomfort in the crowd.

Abir being Abir noticed it, however for god known reason he let it unquestioned and I'm too grateful for it. I don't know why I let him stay back with me. He always had his way and I end up playing in his hands. I know that's because I love him and I wouldn't deny it. I feel safer with Abir because I trust him. He cares for me in his very own way, differently. He wouldn't say it out loud but his concerns are ever so evident.

Today was unexceptional too, where I landed in another tight spot. He wasn't kidding when he spoke about us. He was certain when he looked at my eyes as he talked. Was that a proposal?

I'd rather think so.

And there worked my stupid mouth, I shunned him right away. I could sense his dismay but before I had a chance to talk, he just walked out.

Now my emotions are all over consuming me, I'm disturbed by the fact that he left me in the middle of the conversation. Abir didn't have anything else to say and I think this would be better for both us. We won't be hoping for something that is close to impossible. But then, I've never thought, even in my wildest dream that he would ever like me. Abir is way out of my league and I knew it throughout.

However today was different, he was seriously asking me in words. No more hints or teasing, he had all of my attention.

'I want us together, in a proper committed relationship.'

What am I supposed to think of it?

He loves me?

Hearing it from someone as skittish as Abir was a shock. I realised it was no joke now and I told him about my imminent engagement with Adithya. He looked upset. A small part of me was overjoyed about his feelings towards me, the other larger part was despairing about the impossibility.

I hated that he walked out on me and I'm still trying to convince myself about how best this is for both of us.

Getting inside the apartment, I texted him I reached home. It's angels time when I send him the message, I couldn't help but to wish about us together as he said.

"Mishti look what I've go.." Kuhu pauses as she looks at me from the door.

"What have you brought?" I ask just escape from her inquisition. She is going to grill me as she did yesterday.

"Few dresses. What is it?"

"I've had a good breakfast, thanks to Abir."

"Where's he?"

"Abir? I don't know."

"Wasn't he with you?"

"Yes but he was in a rush."

"I thought he'd be here, with you." She stretched the last part while I just glared. "What? He seems like he would move in with you, if I weren't here."

"Hahaha. Done? Now tell me how did Adithya call you?"

"Your Nannu must have given my number, possibly." Possible. "I told him to fuck off."

"You didn't!" I wouldn't face my father if she said so.

"Not directly but in a very decent way."

"Kuhu, you don't know what you've done."