Asylum

Scars

After the day that Darcy and Steve took care of Bucky, the brunette did not part with them. They spent all their time together, except for when it was time to sleep. They strolled through the gardens, ate at the same table and, from time to time, took small naps on the grass, sheltered by the sun. Now Bucky also had his hiding place for the pills he didn't take.

Almost every night, Steve would take the opportunity to write in his notebook about his experiences: what the facilities were like, how he felt to be locked up there and, above all, the abuse that Bucky had suffered just before meeting him.

Bucky hardly spoke, unless the others asked his opinion on something. However, he always laughed at Darcy's jokes and smiled shyly when he made eye contact with Steve.

The brunette was not very good with words, although he used to express his affection physically. He used to hug Darcy for no apparent reason and play with her hair, or grab Steve's arm when they walked down the hallways, which the blond found adorable.

One afternoon they were sitting on the grass, Steve drawing flowers in pencil on a sheet of paper while Darcy recounted anecdotes about her homework when she was a child. The blond dropped the pencil to rest his hand for a moment because he felt a little cramp, and Bucky took in the action. Immediately, he took Steve's hand in his and gently massaged it with his fingers.

The little massage reached up to Steve's wrist but, when Bucky was finishing, he accidentally pulled the blond's sleeve up, discovering a scar that caught his attention.

The omega lifted Steve's sleeve to elbow for a better view. Then he gaped: the alpha's forearm was covered in small scars, very thin but once deep. As if provoking them had been a habit for him.

"Did you do this to yourself?" Bucky asked in a whisper.

"That was a long time ago."

"But... did you do it?"

Steve simply nodded.

Darcy stopped talking abruptly and looked down, as she did when she felt uncomfortable. But Bucky reacted in a very different way. As if nothing had happened, he began to gently caress Steve's forearm, as if with that he wanted to erase any memory that had caused those scars.

Thus he remained for several minutes; then he came over to hug Steve silently.

That omega's reaction took Steve by surprise. He had good friends, like Clint, Peggy or now Darcy, but he didn't remember when was the last time he felt so supported by someone; he felt like coming home. It was as if Bucky didn't need to say anything to him to express that he was on his side.

"Aren't you going to ask me why I did it?" The alpha asked in a low voice.

"No. Surely you have your reasons for not sharing it. But you know that if you wanted to, I'll listen to you," Bucky replied calmly.

"I do want to, Buck. But I don't know how. I don't talk about this with anyone."

Darcy couldn't look more uncomfortable. "Steve, do you want me to go?"

"What?! No, of course not, Darce..." The alpha sighed deeply. "I started cutting off my arm a long time ago, before going to college. It was right after my mother died. She... she was all I had, and when she left I was completely alone. I no longer hurt myself, and my life has changed a lot. But sometimes I feel like I've never stopped being alone, you know?"

When he finished speaking, a few tears had spilled from his eyes. Bucky and Darcy looked like they were about to cry too.

"You are not alone anymore, dude," Darcy said.

"Don't worry, I'm fine. I'm okay now."

"The thing is you don't have to," Bucky interrupted. "You can be not-okay as long as you want, here we are going to be. Until the end of the line."

This time it was Steve who hugged the omega. There was nothing more he could say.

*****
*****

"Why didn't you tell Bucky the truth?" Darcy asked that same night, after the brunette had left for his room.

"What are you talking about?"

"He doesn't know why you're here, or that you are a journalist. He thinks your mate locked you up here. I don't know, I've been thinking about it and... he doesn't deserve that."

"I know," the blond replied with a sigh. "But it's the best. When Bucky asked me why I was in this hospital, I had just talked to Valentina. She watches us, you know? If she noticed something weird about me, she would immediately go after you or Bucky."

"But I already know the truth, right?"

"Yes, but I didn't tell you the truth, you discovered it. I had lied to you too."

"You know that nothing you're saying makes sense, right?"

The blond chuckled. "No, it does make sense. I guess I can't erase your memory, but I can still protect him, right?"

Darcy winced, but she knew she wouldn't convince Steve otherwise.