Forever my quarterback/Finn Hudson

I wanna hold your hand

After a while I was starting to get tired so I went back to my room, Quinn had taken Beth back. Jake was going to meet me in my room so I wasn't alone since Burt was going to stay with Kurt because he was starting to run a fever and they were worried he would need surgery sooner rather than later. Quinn had taken a very fussy Beth back to her house, she didn't want Beth in the hospital to long.

I walked down the halls to get to my room but everything was spinning. I was so dizzy and my head hurts but I just needed to make it to my room. I was taking deep breaths, holding onto the wall for support. When I made it to the elevator I leaned on the wall, and started crying. I was started to get nervous I wasn't going to make it to my room. The doors opened and I saw Jake standing in the hallway laughing with Emily.

"Jake," I cried, he looked over at me still smiling. But he lost his smile and ran over to me, wrapping me in his arms as I broke down. "Everything is going wrong," I sobbed loudly. He picked me up and carried me sobbing back into my room. He laid down in the bed with me, letting me curl up as close to him as I could. "I want daddy and I want Noah!" I cried into Jakes chest.

"Shsh, Char. I know, pooh bear. I've got you, JJ's got you," He played with my hair softly, He knew that I just needed to cry. I knew that no matter what I did Noah and my dad were dead, Kurt had brain cancer, I tried to kill myself, and my life was falling apart.

"I just want to die!" I said before I could stop myself, Jake sighed and just held me tighter. "Jake, I can't do this anymore! What if the doctors say I can't have kids? What if Kurt dies? Blaine will never get over it! Burt can't lose his son! Jake I can't lose Kurt," I pounded my fist into his chest, He took my hands and kissed them both.

"You won't lose Kurt, honey. And if they say you can't have kids then you'll adopt. No matter what you will be okay, honey," He started humming 'I hope you dance', I slowly fell asleep. I was just to tired to try to fight it anymore.

"Oh yeah, of course I don't mind staying with Charlotte for a few hours. Don't worry about me, I feel fine," I woke up to Kurt telling Jake, "Go save Marley from a screaming Kammie," Jake laughed and walked out leaving Kurt. "Holy shit," He whimpered and leaned on the chair, clearly not realizing I was awake.

"Hey, you okay?" I sat up in my bed, causing Kurt to look over at me. That's when I saw how pale he was. "Hey come sit down, you look like you're going to faint," I moved over, Kurt all but collapsed in the bed with me. "I thought you had a fever, Kurt you still do," I felt his burning skin, he nodded and hide in my shoulder.

"I just needed my sister, and she was sleeping so I convinced the doctors to let me come and try and convince you to come with me. Please," He was sobbing and I could tell he didn't feel good. "I mean, I know you might not want to because all I've been doing for the last two hours is puking and crying but I need you," I pulled his head down to my chest, rubbing his head softly.

"I've got you now, Kurt. I'm here, sweetheart," I kissed the top of his head, he was clutching my shirt so tight I was afraid it would rip. "You really don't feel good do you?" I asked as Kurt started to fall asleep on me. "Hey, we can't fall asleep, we have to go back to your room. You IV needs to be put back in after your skans," I helped him stand up and we walked to his room. He pulled me back down to his bed, his room smelt of sweat and vomit.

"Well, if I shake this fever by tomorrow afternoon I get to go home the day after, then I start chemo next week. They don't know when the surgery will be done," Kurt was fidgeting with the fabric of my shirt. "When are you leaving?" He asked me.

"Well, I have to get a few tests to see if I fucked up my body. I took a lot so um..." I looked up at the wall to hide the tears, "Their worried about my body going into shock. And if it does well then god only knows. But they said I look to be doing great so unless something else comes up in the tests then I'll be leaving tomorrow. So I get to spend the day with you," I kissed the top of his head, "And um, well I kinda make my own rules because of the whole no parent thing so I am taking off as much school as you are." I chuckled slightly.

"We can do homeschool together for a while? I mean we are going to every glee club meeting because we both need some kind of normality for a while," He started to fall asleep as I hummed softly.

FLASHBACK NOAH'S POV (10 years ago)

"Noah?" my room was pitch black given it was 3 in the morning, but I knew that little tired voice anywhere. I sat up in my bed and looked over towards my door, Jake was standing there holding his blanket.

"Hey JJ, what's going on?" I turned on my lamp that was on my nightstand and saw that there were tears running down his face. "Baby Bro, come here," he walked over and climbed into my arms. His tiny body was on fire and he was sweating. "Jake, you're burning up. Do you feel poorly?" I asked as I pulled my blanket over both of us.

"I frew up in my bed," he cried. Jake's only 5 and I'm more of a parent to her then mom. Dad is... well dead. "I sorry, didn't mean to be bad," Hhe put her hands under my shirt and felt my heartbeat.

"You're not bad, you're so good. Everybody gets sick," I whispered, running my fingers through his hair. "Should we go get Charlotte and have a sleepover?" I asked, Charlotte was 7 and loved to cuddle with his little brother. Charlotte's always been so protective of Jake, even when she was two and our mother came home from the hospital with him and just left him in my arms. She was so happy to finally be about to get drunk again.

"Yes please, can I stay here though? I don't wanna get up," he curled up under my blanket, I kissed his head. I walked down the hall to Charlotte's room, only tripping over something once. Charlotte was curled up, hugging her little pooh bear stuffed animal. I walked over to her bed, picking her up softly.She made a really cute coo, rubbing her face into my shoulder. I may only be 9 almost 10 but she was tiny so it was easy for me to carry her.

"'oah?" She mumbered, still rubbing her face on my shoulder. I kissed the top of her head and walked back into my room to see Jake curled up with my pillow cradling the blanket that our dad gave him before he died. "JJ sad?" Charlotte asked, his voice coated with sleep.

"Yeah, Jake feels yucky. Wanna cuddle and make him feel better?" Charlotte all but jumped out of my arms and next to Jake.

" Hi, JJ. You not feel good?" She brushed some of Jake's hair away from his face. I chuckled softly, watching how those two interacted with each other. "It's otay, I got you," Jake hide his face in Charlotte's chest. I laid down next to them, turning off the lamp.

"Jake, tell me if you start to feel sick again please," I told her, she didn't say anything. "Jake?"

"Shshs, 'oah. He's sleepin'," She slapped my arm, I laughed quietly and curled up next to them. Charlotte was playing with Jake's hair. "Hope you never lose your chance of wonder, when one door closes I hope one more opens," She sang to her. I smiled and kissed the top of her head. "He burnin up, 'oah," Charlotte whimpered and looked up at me with these big green eyes. They filled with those tears I have seen more times then I would like in these last few weeks. "Is he going to die?" I knew this was going to be hard for her, it's the first time any of us has gotten sick since dad died.

"No honey, his tummy just hurts," I wiped the tears off her cheek. She tried not to sob I could tell, She put her hand over her mouth and leaned into my shoulder. "His tummy is just-" I started but she cut me off.

"YEAH AND DADDY'S TUMMY WAS JUST HURTING AND THEN HE DIED!" She cried, Jake whimpered and rubbed his face on Charlotte's shoulder. "Shshs, I'm sorry JJ. You're okay, Shshs," She rubbed her hand up and down his back as Jake cried in his sleep. "Jake? Hey wake up! He's having a nightmare," She told me as she sat up, pulling him onto her lap. Jake had a tendency to have horrible nightmares when he had fevers.

"Lottie, help me," He sobbed, and clung to her. "Make it stop," He screamed, Charlotte put her hand over his mouth. We all knew the rule, never wake mom up. She's always made when you do. She cringed when I saw him bite her hand. "Scared," He whimpered. She pulled her hand away from his mouth, looking at his trembling body.

"Charlotte and 'oah won't let anything happen to you. Right, Nunu?" She smiled at me but I could see the tears in her eyes. I nodded and hugged them tightly.

"Nothing will ever happen to us, us Puckerman's have to stick together,"

END FLASHBACK

Yeah, you lied Noah.