As it hits 7:30pm, I just barely finish my last assignment and rush to hop in the shower before Chevon shows up. Now of course I know nothing is gonna happen but I gotta make sure I smell nice being that this is our first-time meeting in person, and I definitely don't want to leave a bad impression. but again, I don't know why I'm so excited for this but I'm definitely not gonna complain about the feeling either. I mean what's the worst that can happen right?
I get the text that he's outside and finish throwing on my clothes, grab my shoes and start my tip toe down the hall toward the steps. As I make it toward the door, I pause for just a second only to make sure my mother is still asleep, and then shut the door with the slightest of ease does not alert her in anyway. I run as fast I could to the car and hop in like I wasn't just freaking in my head only moments ago.
"Damn you smell nice" Chevon says as I shut the car door.
I laugh "well thank you, I'm glad you like it" I reply
"What cologne is that? it smells kind of sweet." he asks
" I actually don't wear cologne out like that, only for special occasions, this is just a body spray" I state.
"Aww so you didn't think this was a special enough occasion to put some on?" he says in a sarcastic tone
"HA! Not even, we're sitting outside of my house in your car, what's so special about that?" I snap back
"Oh damn its like that?" he continues
"Oh brother, I'm just saying this isn't a met gala or anything, we all chilling" I say jokingly even though, deep down I'm very glad to be in his presence.
"I know I know, I just like fucking with you" he says "but for real though how was your day today? I mean I know we talked today but like that still don't mean I know how your day went"
"My day was cool, nothing too crazy, just felt really long in some places" I state.
By this point, Chevon has started to roll up a blunt and my nerves start to kick in,
I've never smoked before, im about to embarrass myself
What if I choke?
I couldn't let myself get too deep in thought because im supposed to be leading the conversation here.
"So, like what exactly is it that you do for a living?" I asked
"Oh, I sell drugs baby boy" he replied
We both stop for minute and it's just silent,
"I'm joking shawty," he laughs hysterically "Damn you should've seen your face" he continues laughing.
I can't even imagine what I looked like, but I know it couldn't have been anything outside of shocked. I haven't ever dealt with anything drug related let alone a drug dealer, I got a little nervous just that quick.
"But nah I'm a part time student going for my degree in criminology, so I work at night at a store as a food stocker full-time."
"Oh, thank god" I said relieved
"Damn I do still sell drugs though" he laughed again "but nothing hard tho, only weed"
"Wait so how do you manage all that? Like how are you not tired?" I said confused
"Honestly, I like the hustle, it keeps me focused on my future. I got big plans for myself that I got to reach"
"Like what?" I replied
"That's a longer story but in general I wanna be a lawyer, specifically one that takes on criminals who have been accused of drug charges, you know help the community and shit"
"Oh, wow that's admirable, but don't you think it's kinda counterproductive with you selling drugs currently?"
"What you mean?" he replied
"Like what's gonna happen if you get caught selling?" I asked
"Who getting caught baby boy? I'm not new to this, I'm true to this my boy." he laughed
I laughed too. Chevon has this way of saying things that makes you smile without any of it actually meaning anything. Like I don't know what to even call it but simple conversation with him just feels so natural and fun. Like I haven't stopped smiling while talking to him and we aren't even discussing anything serious.
but honestly, this could just be the weed talking .
"So can I ask you something?" I prefaced trying to prepare him for my next line of interrogation
"Fosho baby boy, what's up?" he replied.
"So, like, what do you what out of life for real?" I said
"Uh...what you mean?" he said looking at me concerned.
"I guess i mean... like... love wise, like do you ever want to come out or be with a man? or do you just plan on dating women for the rest of your days?" I laughed but it was a serious question.
"I mean... I aint ever really thought about it forreal... Like don't get me wrong I know I like niggas or whatever you want to call it but like I've never really imagined being with a dude forreal long term. that shit sound kinda scary forreal forreal." he says "What made you even ask that? you crushing on me already?" he said with an annoying smirk.
"Negro shut up," I laughed "didn't nobody say all that. Im just simply curious as to where your head is at is all." I said.
It was definitely a lie though. I definitely knew that deep down inside i was starting to like this boy which was not a good thing. I know how these stories end and Im not sure if i want to get my feelings hurt like that again. I'm sure I am over thinking this per usual but overthinking is the only way i can protect myself from pain.
what can you do ?
"I mean... you got a nice lil vibe baby boy, maybe you could be the one to change my mind on all this if you was down for it, I aint saying I'm committed or nothing just yet or none but i think i could be open to the idea..."
"I mean i'm open to it as long as you are" I said back trying play it cool and not to blush.
"Aight, say less then baby boy" he replied with a smirk.
After that we ended up talking until the middle of midnight and it truly all just felt so... refreshing, just getting to know each other. I honestly don't remember how but somehow we ended up in his back seat with his head laid in my lap and it just felt right to be honest. I almost didn't want to leave but I knew my parents would be up eventually but before i left we said our goodbyes and made plans to try and do this again tomorrow.
I exit the car and try to slyly open the front door to my house and close it as quiet as possible and as I turn around I see my dad sitting in the dark living room facing the TV. I'm praying he doesn't see me so I try to tip toe towards the steps as quiet as possible and then he says,
"So......did we have fun tonight young man?"
Great, I am definitely screwed...
YOU ARE READING
Never Have I Ever
Teen FictionA simple story of a young boy named Deon who is struggling with finding love and sexuality and not actually knowing where he belongs in the midst of it all.
