My Knight in Shining Armor

Chapter XVI

My mama made me stay home for a while after I got out of the hospital. I pretended to be sad that I couldn't go see my friends, but it really was alright—I knew they'd come to me.

One afternoon, I sat at the dining table, a smile on my face. Dallas had brought me food from the Dingo, and we were eating 'in', rather than eating 'out.'

"You know, Dally, you did it again."

He looked at me inquisitively. "I did what again?"

"You were my knight in shining armor."

"Only after you were for me."

I smiled. The two of us had already been through more together than the average couple in their whole life together, and yet again, Dallas had come to my rescue. I knew my mother would laugh and agree with me when I told her about it.

"What do you wanna do?" Dally asked me.

I thought for a moment. "I'm not sure. I've done just about everything I can do, and it's only day three of seven."

Dally leaned against the television, and accidentally turned it on. "Winston, you're a genius," I laughed.

We sat down on the couch together and waited for the next movie to start. That was the thing about watching television—unless you went out of your way to buy a program list, you never knew what was going to be on. Lucky for us, it was Love Me Tender, my favorite Elvis Presley movie.

We sat in silence, until the door suddenly burst open. Steve and our friends came marching in. Two-Bit cocked an eyebrow, put his hands on his hips, and posed like Superman. "Folks, your entertainment has arrived."

Steve gestured towards Soda and Two-Bit. "To start us off, Two-Bit and Soda will perform a live cooking show."

Dally and I started laughing. Two-Bit had never lifted a spatula in his life. The closest he'd been to that was the fork he lifted every day when he had chocolate cake from the Curtis house. And Soda... I'd seen some of the food he made, and it was never normal. We're talking green pancakes here.

I sat at the table beside Dally, and Ponyboy took the 'stage.' "We welcome you to Cooking with..." Pony turned around and whispered to the others. "...Coke and Mickey!"

Everyone started laughing hysterically. It was just like those two to do something like that. Ponyboy cleared his throat. "We must ask the audience to refrain from telling the cooks what to do, as the fun in the show is to watch them fail. Enjoy!"

Two-Bit was glaring at Pony. "We can cook, ya know."

I laughed. "Sure, sure."

Soda started reading the instructions to Two-Bit. "For this 'Super Moist Chocolate Mayo Cake,' pre—"

Two-Bit gasped. "Mayo? In chocolate cake?"

Soda shrugged. "Yeah. We couldn't do a regular chocolate cake, because I already know how to make those." He looked at the recipe again. "Preheat the oven to 350 degrees."

"How do you preheat the oven?"

"You gotta turn it on. Turn up the temperature on it."

"But that's just cooking the oven!"

"No, it's cooking the air in the oven."

Two-Bit did what he was told and peeked over Soda's shoulder. "Grease and lightly flour two 9-inch round cake pans? I can grease a pan." Two-Bit pulled a small bottle of hair grease from his pocket and pulled out the pans.

"Don't do that!" Soda panicked. "You have to use butter to grease the pan!"

Two-Bit greased the pan with butter—a lot of butter—and found a bowl. As the instructions said, he poured a box of chocolate cake mix into the bowl and started stirring.

Soda started laughing. "Two-Bit, you don't need to stir that yet. It's mixed up enough!" He looked back at the recipe. "Now we need a cup of mayonnaise." While Two-Bit searched the fridge for mayo, Soda turned to me. "I think I'll name my first daughter Mayonnaise. I can call her May for short, and no one will suspect a thing! Meanwhile, Mayonnaise will go her whole life knowing her name is Mayonnaise." By the end, he was doubled over, laughing hard.

Two-Bit slammed the refrigerator door shut. "All I could find was this expired mayo."

"How expired?"

"Two months."

"Eh. It should be fine once it's baked."

I pinched the bridge of my nose in amused disappointment but started laughing shortly after. Somehow, the boys were able to get the cup of water in with only a few spills, but half of the eggshells ended up in the batter.

Soda squinted at the recipe. "I think we need a teaspoon of cinnamon."

Two-Bit pumped his fist in the air. "I love cinnamon!" He grabbed the pepper, mistaking it for cinnamon, and poured not a teaspoon, but a tablespoon of it in. It was all I could do not to gasp aloud.

Soda and Two-Bit began to stir the batter, both of them at the same time. Soda had a hold on the bowl with one arm and was beating the batter with a whisk he held in his other hand. Two-Bit had a spoon in each hand and was trying to mix at the same time.

"Now it's time to bake for half an hour," Soda said. At least he knew how to do that, seeing that he'd baked chocolate cakes before.

While we waited for it to bake and cool off, we told Soda, and especially Two-Bit, everything they'd done wrong. Finally, a slice of the disaster was set before us, and we all ate it, each of us taking a bite at the same time.

"This is terrible," I laughed, my mouth full. Everyone agreed with me, except Two-Bit, who was scarfing it down at record speed.

Once he'd finished, Two-Bit bowed. "We shall be back at this time tomorrow."

"Well, that was an adventure," Dally said to me as the boys left.

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Author's note
There's a light-hearted chapter for y'all. I enjoyed writing it. So, I thought I'd include the recipe, just for fun, although, I have never made it before. I'll definitely try it this summer and try not to fail as much as 'Coke and Mickey'

SUPER MOIST CHOCOLATE MAYO CAKE by Best Foods

Found on bestfoods.com

INGREDIENTS

• 1 box (16.5 oz.) chocolate cake mix

• 1 cup mayonnaise

• 1 cup water

• 3 eggs

• 1 tsp. ground cinnamon (optional)

METHOD

• PREHEAT oven to 350°. Grease and lightly flour two 9-inch round cake pans*; set aside.

• BEAT cake mix, mayonnaise, water, eggs and cinnamon 30 seconds in large bowl with electric mixer on low speed. Beat on medium speed, scraping sides occasionally, 2 minutes. Pour batter into prepared pans.

• BAKE 30 minutes or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool on wire rack 10 minutes. Remove cakes from pans and cool completely. Sprinkle, if desired, with confectioners sugar or fill and frost.