Forever.

Chapter 18: I Need to See Him

Claire's P.O.V. (Early the next morning)

I slept for maybe 20 minutes last night. All I wanted was to lay with Braden. I wanted to fall asleep in his arms and have him wake me up by gently kissing me. But instead I slept in a chair, waiting for the doctor to let me see Braden's body. They haven't yet. They haven't told me anything, not that there's anything to tell.

I stand up and go to the bathroom.

What do you see when you look in the mirror? Well, when I look in the mirror I see nothing. I see nothing because I don't look in the mirror. I don't look in the mirror because I don't want to see myself without the thing I want most. I don't want to see myself without the thing I want most because I know I can't have it. I know I can't have it because my life isn't a fairy tale.

"Claire?" I hear a quiet voice ask through the door.

"Go away." I say through a strangled voice.

"Claire, come on, open up." They say as they slightly knock.

"I said go away." I snap.

"Come on, doofus, open up." They say.

Oh

My

God.

It's Jake. Jake is here. Only he calls me that.

I open the door and Jake has a concerned look on his face.

"Claire! Oh my god." He says as he hugs me. It feels good to have a familiar embrace.

"What are you doing here?" I ask as I wipe a tear from my cheek.

"I saw what happened on the news and flew out here immediately." He says.

"You saw?" I ask.

"Yeah. Are you okay? Where's Braden?" He asks.

I can't say it again, I can't say it. I just start sobbing instead.

"Oh my god, Claire? Are you hurt? Claire, please tell me. Are you hurt?" He asks, and it just makes me cry even more because Braden once said the exact same thing to me. "What happened?" He asks as he places his hands on my shoulders.

"Braden's dead." I choke out. His hands drop.

"What?" He asks shocked.

"He died yesterday after he got to the hospital. I don't know what killed him because the doctors won't say anything." I say. I see Jake's eyes gloss over and he pulls me to him again.

"I'm so sorry. I know how much he meant to you." He whispers.

"I saw it happen." I say. I don't know why, but I want to tell him what happened. I don't want to talk about it, but I do at the same time.

"What?" He asks.

"I saw him die. I was outside the room when it happened." I say as I start crying again.

"I'm sorry." He says quietly as he sniffs. "He was a good guy and he did great things. He impacted others, and you impacted him. I don't think he would have wanted a different life. He loved you, and that's what matters." He says as he pushes me back slightly.

"I know."

"Are you okay?" He asks.

"Do you think I'm okay? My boyfriend just died." I say.

"I know. I wouldn't be able to deal with it either." He says.

"What?" I ask.

"I can't even imagine losing someone that important to you." He says.