Forever.

Chapter 36: Freaking out

Braden's P.O.V. (2 months later)

I turn over on my side and look at Claire. She's still asleep, and she's so beautiful. The covers lay perfectly over her body, rising at her stomach. Her stomach is so much bigger now that she's seven months pregnant. She's been getting a lot more tired throughout the past couple of weeks.

I don't blame her. She's been stressing out about some of this baby stuff as she's getting closer to her due date. I haven't had my freak out moment yet, but I can feel it coming soon.

The house is almost done, like really almost done. Just one more room needs to be painted and then the moving in begins. I can't believe we are going to be living in a house together. I know that we've lived in multiple apartments together before, but a house is a big step.

I stand up and quietly walk out of the room, gently closing the door behind me. I go into the kitchen and almost trip on a bag. I dodge the fall. I bend over and pick up the bag. Inside is a pair of white socks. But they aren't for people. They're for a baby. They're so small, how can anyone's foot fit in this? How can anything that's mine fit in this?

Oh my god.

Here it is.

My freak out moment.

I'm going to be a father. I always knew that, but it's now sinking in. We are going to have a baby. There's food, clothes, and college to think about. It won't just be Claire and I anymore. We'll both have one more person that means so much to us. Will the baby cause problems for us?

What if I'm bad at this? What if I can't do anything right and all of the responsibility falls on Claire? What if the baby doesn't like me and there's nothing I can do about it? I wouldn't be able to live with myself if any of that happened.

Oh my god.

What if-

"Hey," Claire says, snapping me out of my thought. I pick my head up, not knowing I dropped it.

I put the socks down and try to push the thought out of my head.

"You good?" She asks as he comes over and wraps her arms around my neck. She presses her stomach gently against mine and looks into my eyes. She scans them multiple times. "You're freaking out aren't you?"

I nod.

"Don't think about what could go wrong, it just makes it worse." She says.

"That's not my problem."

"Then what is it? Talk to me." She says.

I gently pull away and pace the room.

"What if I turn out like him?" I ask.

She scrunches her eyebrows together in confusion. "What?" She asks.

"What if I turn out like my dad? What if I completely lose it one day and take my anger or frustration out on the baby?"

"What? No. That will never happen." She says as she places her hands on the sides of my face. "You're nothing like that man. You're so sweet, caring, and you don't have an abusive bone in your body. You won't be anything like you're father because you actually care."

"That's what I'm afraid of." I whisper.

"What?" She asks.

"My dad used to care. One day he came home and was mad about something that happened at work. He took it out on me and found out that I'm an excellent way to get rid of this anger. I don't want to end up like him. I don't want to be abusive, rude all the time, and drunk 24/7. I don't want to be his clone!" I yell as I step back.