Her shades of Hues

Chapter 13

Felicity's pov.

"So that's the baby right there." We are looking at the sonogram. My lips are not touching each other and I feel like crying just by looking at my baby in the monitor.

"Do you want to know now the baby's gender?" Asked by the Doctor so I swiftly looked at her and to Rhys who's next to me.

We both nodded. I want to look at the sonogram but I think I need to picture this moment first. I need to instill this feeling and this moment in my head. I don't want this to end.

Rhys feels so proud and happy, I've never seen him this happy before. When we first went to the doctor, he look constipated and happy at the same time but right now, it's different. It speaks full happiness.

"It's a baby girl." I looked at the sonogram. I expected it to be a boy but that's okay. That's my baby. As long as she's healthy, I'm fucking good.

I softly put my left hand at my lips to stop myself from crying louder. I turned to Rhys when he suddenly held and kiss the back of my hand. He's not looking at me but still at the sonogram.

"The baby is healthy. Felicity, as you know you are 20 weeks pregnant now so please stay away from stressful things. Also, continue taking vitamin D and folic acid." The doctor added.

"Why are you so down? Is there something wrong?" I looked at Rhys as I was stopped from walking. As much as I want to stare at his glorious image, I couldn't bear the light from the sun so I closed my eyes for a minute.

"There's nothing wrong, I'm just thinking." I said and started to walk again.

We are in the beach, waking. It's like we are having some fun here but we just came here for my check up. We went here instead of getting me checked in a hospital in the city where we live.

"What are you thinking then?" He asked as he tried to catch me from walking away.

"You see, I'm just like my Mom. My Mom had me out of wedlock... now, can you see me?" I stopped walking to see him. My eyes hurt from the sun but I bear it this time.

He moved to cover the sun.

"See you, what?" He asked again in his serious tone.

"M-mess? Bitch?" It's in my low voice. I moved my eyes and stared at the sand at our feet.

"I'm a fuckin' mess, Rhys. I'm happy that I saw our child in that thing awhile ago but I can't stop thinking... that, what if she became like me? I don't want that for her."

"You are not a mess, Felicity."

"I am. I don't deny it Rhys. I am a mess now, before, and what if in the future, I'm still a mess even though I'm already a Mom? That would suck!"

Rhys slowly put his arms on both of my shoulders and I can't help but to look at him.

"Have you felt love before?" My lips parted by his question.

"Honestly? No." His eyes soften as he heard my response.

"Then, we'll let her grew up with love. Let's be there for her, every time. You don't need to worry too much... you'll be a great mother."

He put his finger on my forehead. "Stop creasing your forehead. It doesn't look good. Plus, the doctor told you not to stress yourself too much."

I held at his hand on my forehead. "But what can I do? Thoughts are roaming in my head."

He slowly put down his hand and that made me loose my grip on his hand. I bit my lower lip as I let go of his hand.

My lips parted as I look at him with my surprise eyes. He held my hand. Oh God! This time, he hold my hand without any commotion, without any complain.