"Do you want take out?" Sheryl's words were barely audible, mumbled into the lyric sheet they were poring over together in the recording booth.
"Mm-hm," she felt Lindsey's eyes on her. "Ok, I think we've got this. Ready to go again?"
Lindsey cued them up and they began to sing, their voices blending together perfectly. He had always been quietly impressed by Stevie's uncanny ability to wrap her voice around whoever she was singing with, subconsciously adopting their tone, phrasing, even accent in order to create the most melodic vocal.
"Perfect. Thank you, ladies."
Without thinking, Stevie snaked her arms around Sheryl's waist from behind, freezing at Lindsey's surprised expression before trying to style it out anyway. Sheryl politely patted her girlfriend's forearm and the arms dropped from around her.
"I, uh, just have to use the..." Sheryl's voice fell to a mumble as she pointed in the direction of the restroom and she made a quick exit.
It was late, and everyone else had long since left. Stevie cleared her throat, unsure of what to say to the man she had long considered the love of her life now they were alone. When she did find the words, so did he.
"So, uh -"
"How are the -"
They laughed awkwardly and he raised his eyebrows, gesturing for her to continue.
"How are the kids?"
"Uh, good, yeah, good." He looked away, rubbing the back of his neck in the way she knew he did when he felt uncomfortable.
"You sure?"
The recording of Say You Will had been as characteristically fraught as any other Fleetwood Mac record. Even Stevie's hidden domestic bliss didn't stop her going toe to toe with Lindsey on an almost daily basis. But in the moments of peace between them, the deep care and affection shone through like sunshine bursting through gaps in the clouds.
He looked at her.
"I dunno, Steph. Kit keeps talking about another baby...I love having Will and Leelee but I'm just not sure I ever saw myself having such a big family. But what she wants, she gets, so...sorry - you don't wanna hear all this."
"Of course I do." She moved towards him and reached out, continuing as he took her outstretched hands in his. "Obviously I can't relate to it, but it doesn't mean I don't care. Does it always have to be what she wants? Can't you, you know, compromise?"
He flashed her a grin.
"Now, you know better than anyone compromise isn't my strong suit. But it's complicated anyway with this big life stuff. Having the kids helps her feel closer to me, and she's right, they have been good for us, but - I dunno. Without them, would things be the way they are? Is that how a marriage should be? I just feel like it's the easiest way to prove I love her sometimes. Especially....especially with all this," he gestured around the room,"going on."
"All what?"
"Come on now. You know how she feels about us being together."
"Oh." She frowned. "That's still an issue for her?"
"I think it would be for anyone, given our history. You've got it easy - not having anyone to worry about."
I've got it easy having someone who trusts me, Stevie thought. And yet she realized in that moment there was so much she didn't tell Sheryl about Lindsey. When they would talk about their day over dinner or in bed, she would consciously not mention him any more than the bare minimum. And even then it was only to complain about the power struggle between them. Why had it been her instinct to lie to Sheryl and downplay any affection between her and her ex? A nagging feeling of discomfort began to take root.
"Hey...where are you?" She snapped her attention back to the man standing in front of her. "You ok?"
"Fine," she lied. "C'mere."
She pulled him into a tight embrace, finding him locking around her as easily as ever. She could smell his cologne as she felt him stroke her hair, and her worries about what was actually going on seemed forgotten.
"Stevie, are you - oh." Sheryl's voice brought her hurtling back to reality and she sprung away from a confused Lindsey guiltily.
"Yes! Yes, let's go. Sorry, Linds - are you ok clearing everything up?"
"Uh, yeah, sure. I'll probably sleep here tonight anyway." He glanced between the two women, still trying to piece together what had caused the sudden tension in the room.
"Great," she was already scooping up her belongings and rushing out the door after Sheryl, who had walked out ahead of her without saying goodbye to Lindsey.
"Hey!" He caught up to her. "What's going on? We weren't doing anything wrong -"
"No." She avoided his gaze. "No, we weren't, but...look, it's complicated. I've gotta go."
And she was gone before he could say any more.
