willing

twenty six

two days later
Luke.

We knew the funeral was coming up, therefore Tate knew that she had to talk to Lily about it.

"I can call in if you want me to." I whispered to her freshly awoken self, kissing her cheeks gently.

"No you've called in a lot for us." She mumbled, leaning into my chest.

"Okay" i exhaled, feeling the worry of how Lily would take it and how Tate would feel telling her daughter that her father is dead.

"Well if you need anything, please call me- i can be home in five minutes." I told her, feeling her kiss me gently.

"Thank you Luke" she mumbled.

"Anything for my girls." I whispered, kissing her lips gently before covering her back up, knowing she would go back to sleep, because it was five in the morning.

I left with the guys for work, them all equally worried about the girls today.

"She knows that she can call me if anything happens."

Tate.

I woke up around eight, making myself get up and shower.

I put on light makeup and straightened my hair, not sure of what Lily would want to do today, but wanting to be prepared for if she wanted to go out. 

Soon Lily woke up, an immediate smile on her face.

"Good morning pretty girl" i smiled, kissing her multiple times.

After small talk, her telling me about her dreams and asking where Luke was multiple times, i gave her options for what we could do today

"We could go to the zoo and then bring the guys some lunch after, we could go to the-" "the zoo and then guys!" She yelled out.

"Lets do that then, lovebug"

I got her dressed into a pair of shorts and a cute light brown tank top and white vans.

"How are we doing your hair, pretty girl?" I asked her.

"Braids" she smiled.

I quickly did two french braids, putting bows of her choice at the ends before exhaling.

"Before we go, mommy has to talk to you." I spoke, making her face me, seeing her smile.

"So you know how you and I left daddy not long ago and we moved in with Luke and the guys?" I spoke slowly.

She gave me a nod.

"Well- a few days ago, daddy got hurt." I spoke, seeing her expression change.

"And daddy passed away- daddy died." I spooe carefully, using Ashtons advice to sugar coat it, but not enough to give her hope that he would come back.

"Daddy is gone?" She asked me.

"Yes baby, daddy is gone." I spoke, holding her hands as i watched her little face process what i was telling her.

"Will he come back?" She asked me.

"No, my love, daddy isnt going to come back." I told her.

I could tell she didnt exactly understand.

"Do you have any questions?" I asked her.

"Why daddy wont come back?" She asked me.

"Because when people die- they dont come back, they go to a place called Heaven."

I hadnt ever discussed Heaven or God with Lily to an extreme point, she knew what i was saying, but not much more other than it being a safe place that all of her passed animals went to.

"With Gus!" She almost seemed excited, referring to our dog that died about six months ago.

"Yes- daddy is with Gus." I told her, her smile prominent now.

"Can we go?" She shot to me.

"No baby, not for a very long time." I told her.

"Oh" her smile faded.

"But you can talk to them and theyll hear you, you just have to close your pretty eyes and say hey daddy, i love you and i miss you." I aloke to her, seeing her smile.

She immediately mimicked what i said, closing her eyes tightly and whispering a quick "hi daddy."

I kissed her head gently.

"Are you okay?" I asked her once she opened her eyes.

"Yes." She smiled.

"Still want to go to the zoo?" I asked.

"Yes, and bring guys lunch."

Therefore i changed quickly, matching tops with Lily before taking Lily to the car that i had gotten back from Dylan's house- considering it was under my name.

I had gotten all of Dylans life insurance money.

I bought him everything he would need for a nice funeral and a tombstone.

I put more than half of it into a savings account in Lily's name.

And i was saving the rest for us to live on and possibly buy a house or apartment with.

Everything was okay.

Lily and i sang along to Harry Styles as we drove to the zoo.

I walked the zoo with her in my arms almost the entire time, taking many pictures of her as i did.

I got someone to take a few pictures of her and i infront of a giraffe and got Lily ice cream at a small booth, putting sunscreen on her as she ate it.

"Mommy! Lion!" She screamed, pointing to the same lion she had seen five times, making me laugh.

"Hes big, isnt he?"

After another hour of looking at the same animals over and over.

Soon i could tell she was getting tired and hangry, so i carried her out, giving her multiple options of lunch items.

We decided on a small salad and pasta place, picking up food for the guys and ourselves before heading to the hospital.

"I take a small nap" i heard her yawn out, making me laugh lightly

"Take a small nap"