Liar, Liar, Liar | 18+

chapter seventeen

+ S C A R L E T T   D ' A N G E L O +

I don't know how I ended up at the beach, but I did.

It was a cold summer's night and I regret not bringing my shawl with me. Nonetheless, I was sat in this skimpy dress with my knees to my chest.

My mother died tonight. 

After weeks of no calls and no texts, I knew I had a bad feeling. I knew something was wrong, but I didn't follow it.

After I asked Kai about who Jerry McFarlane was and he couldn't give me a straight answer, I googled him.

He was my mother's doctor. Kai shot him because he owed him money.

He was the only doctor who would take care of my mom. All because she was a gang wife. But Jerry cared for her until her last breath.

She was already dead when I found her, lying in a bed.

At least she was comfortable. It made me wonder if Kai knew my mother was dying. I knew my father did. But why didn't she tell me? 

I sniffled, hot tears sticking to my face as the wind blew harshly.

A headache was forming behind my eyes but I didn't care. I just wanted to say goodbye to my mother. Or at least tell her I love her.

And now I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life. 

Nobody loves me. Not like my Mom did. My father's never even gotten me a present on my birthday. He just keeps reminding me that he wishes I were a boy.

I look down at my hands. I'd been gripping onto paper documents that were by her bed. I was afraid to read them.

But I opened them up. Crying the second I read the first line.

Stage 4 Thyroid Cancer.

She had fucking cancer. And she didn't even tell me. I wouldn't be forcing her to help me move house or burden her with my stories if I'd had known she was going to die.

Why didn't she tell me. 

My phone lit up for the first time since I'd left, and I didn't realise how late it was.

It was nearing one in the morning. I had walked to the beach, no sense of direction or anything. I was so numb after touching my Mom's hand and it was ice cold. I couldn't believe it - I still can't.

It was a message from Kai.

Where are you?? We're under attack, need backup.

I glanced at it briefly, not bothering to answer.

He knew. 

He definitely knew the whole time and that's why he didn't tell me. 

I wanted nothing more than to yell and scream at him. But I also want him to hold me and tell me it's going to be okay. Because I don't know if I will be.

My Mom was my whole life. 

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I left the beach with a cold and arrived home shortly after 2am.

I caught an Uber and cried the entire way home. I think the Uber guy was worried about me because he kept asking if I was alright. 

I haven't spoken since, only spoke to God and recited prayers in Spanish that my Mom loved.

I looked at my apartment walls on the way to my bedroom, pictures of my Mom and I.

I bit my trembling lip, pulling out a bottle of rum from the top cupboard and unscrewing the cap. I downed a quarter of it, going in for a second swig when my phone rang.

"What?" I spat.

"Where are you?" Kai was on the other line.

"My apartment." 

Silence, "How long have you been there?" 

I glanced at the time, "Seven minutes." 

"Are you okay?"

God I hated that question.

"Is this important or can I go? I don't want to talk to you." I spoke up.

Maybe it was the alcohol or the fact that I hated everyone and everything right now, but Kai is pissing me off. How dare he?

"Why? What did I do?" He asked.

I rolled my eyes, "If you don't know then that's the problem." 

He stuttered, "Who is Jerry McFarlane?" I asked him again, putting emphasis on the words.

He still couldn't answer me.

I muted myself, sobbing into my clothes. I slid down the wall, struggling to breath, "Scarlett?" Kai's voice came through after a while.

"I have to go." I sniffled, "Wait Scar-"

I hung up on him and threw my phone. Then I threw it again.

I threw it until it was smashed into a million pieces. I threw it so hard it dented my wall.

It still lit up, but I couldn't use it.

Instead, I picked the phone up and put it in the bin, picking up the rum bottle and going to bed. I'm going to have a headache tomorrow but I don't care. Nothing is worse than what I'm feeling right now.

My heart aches for my Mom.

My biggest question is though... why was my father hiding her? He didn't love her. He barely even liked her. Was he trying to keep her from me? Because if he was, I'm going to kill him myself.

I rolled to the right, staring out my window at the lively city. Lights came on, cars honked, music played. People are having the time of their lives.

I rolled to the left, staring at my plain white wall. 

Instead of distracting myself with the people below, I focused everything I had on good memories of my Mom.

Like when she taught me how to drive, or french-braid my hair. My favorite memory is when my father went away on business for two weeks and we got the entire house to ourselves.

That was the most fun we'd ever had.

I smiled, snotty tears staining my face.

My makeup was no doubt everywhere but I didn't care.

I want nothing more than to crawl into a hole with my Mom and never come out. 

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Hi guys :(

I'm sooooooo sorry but it had to happen! It's the story.

Anyway, I hope this didn't trigger anyone too much :\ I wrote this chapter in honor of my aunt who recently passed away from a heart attack. 

Thanks for reading Xx