When You Meet A Man

Lost

It had been two days since Beck's last scene of the Blacklist. She hadn't heard from James in both those days are she was beginning to feel like a lost cause. She has spoken to Gina over the phone all night explaining how if she came to visit so soon, she'd seem desperate but that she was in fact that desperate to go back. Despite Gina's advice, Beck wanted to go back ASAP.
"Hey girlie, coffee?" She texted Diany, hoping for a response. "Still at the studio but you could stop by during lunch and we could grab coffee." Diany responded. Beck's heart filled for the moment, knowing she would see the love of her life again.

Lunch time arrived and Beck had walked over to Diany's trailer. "Back already." Diego said as he passed Beck. "Don't be jealous because I'm getting coffee and you're not." Beck mocked Diego, laughing. Diany jumped out of the trailer and hugged Beck. "Let's gooo!" She said excitedly pointing towards the parking lot. "We going to Starbucks, Dunkin or the old cart?" Diany asked as they began to walk out of the studio. "Let's go for the walk to the side cart, it's a nice day out." Beck smiled, not wanting to leave far from where James was.
On their walk back from grabbing coffee from a street vendor, Beck spotted James on the street laughing with a member of the crew. She was a skinnier woman than she, bright red hair and light eyes. Beck's heart dropped but didn't show any emotion in her face. "It's so good to have coffee on set sometimes. Jon drives me crazy some days." Diany said taking a gulp. "Ha, I know he does. I missed our daily talks! I'm glad I got to grab some coffee with you!" Beck said, still holding onto a full cup of hot coffee. She didn't actually drink coffee but she knew Diany did and she wanted an excuse to come to set.
They passed by James who was still speaking with the crew member and he immediately stopped them. "Ladies!" He said, putting his arms around both. "So good to see you, Rebecca." He said planting a kiss on her cheek. "How have you two been? Jon call you back in?" He asked looking at Beck. "No, just want to grab some coffee." Beck smiled awkwardly looking back at James. He squinted his eyes a bit, knowing she didn't drink coffee but he didn't respond. "And you, my dear?" He asked turning to Weecha. "Wishing Carol would hit me with the boom once more but it's all good." Weecha joked, considering she's been hit with a boom mic a few times by accident. James let out a small chuckle as he walked off back onto the lot.
Diany hugged Beck goodbye as she followed James back.

Beck went home happy to see James but saddened to immediately bump into him with other women. Sure, they weren't doing anything but Beck's self consciousness came back with a vengeance now that James wasn't around to keep her spirits up. Suddenly her phone vibrates and it's him.
"Coffee? New you?" He texted.
"I never drank it, just wanted to visit."
"Then why not just visit."
"Because I JUST finished filming, that's a little weird." Beck replied.
"No it is not. What I find odd is that you purchase a coffee with no intention of drinking it."
Beck sighed heavily before responding.
"How have you been?" She asked.
"I've been well. A bit lonely here and there without you around but I work around it."
"How so?" Beck questioned curiously, thinking he found someone new.
"I have a hand and a bath tub, Beck." He responds.
Beck immediately blushes and smiles as she reads his text.
She decided it would be best to call him & dialed his number.
"Yes?" He answered the phone in a smug tone.
"You could always call if you're feeling lonely." Beck said back slyly.
"Perhaps I could make a few house calls now and then. You know, there's a shoot next week by your apartment. I believe the block over there's a shooting scene and car chase. We have the area closed off for a few blocks." James informed her.
"I may have to check it out."
"I guess I may be seeing you."
"I guess so.." they both spoke in a teasing way.
He was capable of breaking and mending her heart all in the same sentence and he had no idea. As much of a strong woman Beck is in most cases, her attachment to him and weakness for him was her fault point as she had wanted to be with him since she laid eyes on him in the film, SuperNova.

Still in the cast group chat, Hisham posted a photo of the himself and Diany standing next to Joey Harlow's grave. He wrote, "We miss you!"
Beck smiled looking at the photo and responded, "sweet but slightly disturbing to see your own grave."
"We are filming the funeral. So sad!" Diany texted.
Beck smiled, glad her cast mates still kept her in on the group chats.

"ACTION!"

Red stood in front of Joey's grave, wearing all black and looking grim. Behind him stood Weecha, Mierce, Dembe, Ressler, Harold, and Heddie. There was a loud silence in the air as they allowed Red to have his final moment with Joey. Heddie slowly walked behind Raymond, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"It gets easier." She whispered to him.
"It gets harder." He said before turning around and walking back in line with the others.

"As loyal as I am to Raymond, Joe was to Raymond. As caring as Weecha is, Joe was. As sarcastic as Heddie can be.." Dembe began his speech and peered over to Heddie as he said this, "Joey could be more." A low chuckle rumbled within the group as everyone smiled. "Joey was the best part of all of us." He said, looking down at her grave.
Footsteps could be heard behind Harold and as he turned around, Agnes hugged him. Charlene slowly followed behind Agnes. "Thank you for coming." Harold whispered softly to Charlene as he kissed her cheek. "Agnes said she knew Joey well and I didn't feel it fair to deny her, her respects." Charlene responded in Harold's ear. He nodded as he turned and watched Agnes lead over and whisper something to Joey's headstone before returning to him. "What did you say?" Red asked leaning over and smiling at Agnes. "Pinky, that's between us girls." She said before grabbing a hold of Harold's hand. "And here I thought I was as cool as your girl friends." Red said smiling and shaking his head.

"HOLD. CAN WE RE-DO THAT, LET'S CHANGE IT TO, "HERE I THOUGHT I WAS COOL ENOUGH TO BE ONE OF THE GIRLS." Jon shouted from his chair.
James nodded as he leaned back over, waiting for the camera to line up to his face again.
"Sound rolling" Carol announced.
"ACTION. From Pinky!"

Agnes smiled softly and said "Pinky, that's between us girls." She grabbed Harold's hand & held it tightly. "And here I thought I was cool enough to be one of the girls." Red replied smiling and shaking his head.

"CUT. GOOD TAKE."

"Megan, could you please pretend like you still like us?" Diego texted in their group chat.
The group chat between cast members consisted of "Elizabeth Keen, Donald Ressler, Weecha Xiu, Dembe Zuma, Aram Mojtabai, Samar Navabi, Joey Harlow and Harold Cooper" although the only ones who talk frequently are Diego, Diany, Hisham, Amir and Beck. Occasionally Harry Lennix speaks up but Megan and Mozhan rarely talk anymore to the group.

No response. She knew he was joking with her but the current cast sometimes felt like she couldn't be asked to speak to her old cast mates.

Slowly but sure Beck began to feel lost within it all. Her entire acting career she dreamed of being on the Blacklist, only to be killed off and left feeling like she didn't do well enough. Her aspiration for years was to get James to fall in love with her and although they slept together, she knows he isn't at that level with her and is concerned she was just sex in his time of need.