Prior Knowledge: Falling for my

34.

Jacob


1 day later


"Got a new roommate Jack!" The officer teasingly said, dragging me into the cell.


I looked down at the light skinned guy spread across his bed seemingly trying to avoid the officer.


"Get in there Perez..." The officer pushed me further into the cell.


I exchanged death glares with him as He smirked at me. I wanted to kill this son of a bitch.


"Have fun..." He growled and closed the cell door.


His keys rattled as He locked the door. Looking at me through the small window, He finally walked off whistling a tune. I rolled my eyes and turned to face my cell mate. He looked like a clean cut guy, but this is prison. Everybody's in here for a reason and I don't know his. For all I know, He could be a stone cold killer. I didn't want to bother him, and I certainly didn't want him bothering me. I just laid my towel, blanket and other necessities down on my bed. I sighed and sat down on the bed. It felt like I was sitting on a cold hard rock.


"Gotta get use to this..." I ran my fingers through my hair.


Reaching in my pocket, I pulled out a picture of my girl. I can't take being without her and my kids. They're two months now, surprisingly. First time I saw them was on the day of their birth, which was also my birthday and the last time I saw them. I really don't even know how they look now. Babies grow quick within months. They probably look completely different.


Another fucked up thing: I can't keep in contact with Brittny. I can't call her, receive mail from her... nothing. They want me out of her life totally. Not her family, the law. Her family is just as devastated to see me go as me. My family hasn't Heard from me in 5 years and I can just imagine my mom right now. An emotional wreck. She hasn't heard from me in so long, and hearing the news that I'm doing 7 years is enough to give her a heart attack.


"Damn..." I sighed.


I took one last glance at the picture and kissed it. If only it was really her I was kissing. Her soft lips, nice and plump. If just kissing her gave me this much ecstasy, imagine what it was like making those babies... Got Damn! Well... I'm just gonna have to suffer without her. I placed the picture back in my pocket. Placing my arms behind my head, I laid down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. Man. I'm gonna be in hell for 7 years.


"Why you in here..." I heard a voice say. I turned my head from the ceiling and looked at Jack. He was also staring up at the ceiling. Not even releasing his gaze to stare at me, but He wanted to talk.


"Why you in here..." He repeated.


"Molestation..." I said ashamed. He narrowed his eyebrows and cut his eyes from the ceiling to me.


"You raped her?...." He asked.


"No... I made love to her..." I said, placing my eyes back on to the ceiling. I could tell He was getting a little confused.


"You made love to a little girl?" He asked, nearly disgusted.


"No..." I sighed. "She just turned 15..."


His face eased a little, but I could still tell that there was some disgust in his eyes.


"She was my student..." I began to explain.


"You're a teacher?" It seems like every word that came out of his mouth was a question. I shook my head yes and continued.


"We were having secret affairs. The affairs went far and soon she was pregnant..."


"Wait... So you got her pregnant?" He cut me off. I slowly shook my head. "continue... " He said.


"Anyways, she had the babies on my birthday a couple of months ago and the day of their birth was the day the cops took me in custody..." I felt my heart begin to sink in. Some birthday I thought to myself. Just the thought of not being able to see Brittny or my kids, killed me inside.


"... Yesterday, I was sentenced to 7 years for aggravated molestation..."


The room then went silent. The only thing you could hear were the distant voices from the other inmates.


"Wow" Jack broke the silence. "That's deep.... How old are you?"


I ran my fingers through my hair "23..." I husked.


"I'm 26..." He said.


I didn't want to be rude, but the curiosity of knowing was just eating me alive.


"Ummm... Why are you in here?" I asked. He took his glance off of the ceiling for second and looked at me. I think I hit a nerve or something because his face seemed to tense up. I really didn't care how He felt about the question. He was getting all up in my business, so it shouldn't hurt if He just told me something about himself. He took his glance off of me and looked back up at the ceiling.


"...I've been in here for a while." He started. "Since I was 18..."


Damn. That's a long time. I've only been here for a few minutes and already I can't take it. But He still hasn't answered the main question: Why is He in here?


"My mom's boyfriend was a bastard. He did Everything just to hurt her or make her cry. So many nights she would try to sneak out with me and my little brother to escape, but it wasn't worth it. He always ended up crying to her knees telling her that He needed her to make him 'better'. She would always believe him and forgive him..." The room went silent and He took his stare off of me and back onto the ceiling.


"That night... I'll never forget it..." His voice trembled. "He came home all types of fucked up. Whisky and Kush was all you could smell on his breath. The smell of liquor and weed lit the house. My mom wasn't gonna tolerate that shit in her house, around her kids. I still remember their argument... That argument soon went a little too crazy. I was only 17 at the time and my brother was 10... He didn't need to hear that shit. I then took matters into my own hands. We started fighting... then my mom tried to stop it along with my little brother... My mom's boyfriend got one good hit out of me Knocking me out cold..." Again the room went silent. Jack gulped and tried to keep his composure.


"... I woke up... It was quiet. The place was still a mess, but even worse than when we first started fighting, like someone had been fighting afterwards. I looked in the kitchen and saw blood spattered on the walls... It hurt my heart to know what probably happened while I was knocked out... I walked in the kitchen and what I saw was more than what I can handle...." He paused one last time and took a deep breath. "He killed them both." He said between gritted teeth. My eyes nearly shot out my head.


Somehow his story was so similar to Brittny's in a way. They both tried to escape from their mother's lover. Brittny was just a lucky story gone good. Jack's story went completely sour and bit him in the ass. It hurts that I still remember when she use to wear all that clothing. I still remember the first time we had sex. The scares and bruises she had all over her body from her dad.


"I did Everything I could to find that nigga... Went to multiple street sources. It seemed like none of them wanted to talk, but they knew something. I was only 17 at the time...I was lost, but I knew my way around the streets. Then somebody finally spoke. They told me He be dealing at this local warehouse. I decided to pay him a 'visit'..." He Licked his lips. "I walked in that place with fire in my eyes. He was in the corner of the room drugged up and shit. I walked towards him, pulled out my gun I borrowed from a friend.... and BOW!" He clapped his hands with the effect making me jump a little. Jake seemed to have lost the tremble in his voice. It was like He was reliving a nightmare of rage. He just stared off into the ceiling. "...The cops found me a few months later.... Sentenced me to 20 years without probation. Charged with first degree murder..." He finally said.


There's so much I wanted to say, but I was completely lost for words. This guy lost his family. He's alone. I could only imagine what I would do if I lost my mom. Shit. That's deep.


"Damn..." was all I could say.


"I know." He replied.


I thought I had it bad. He's probably suffering inside. He's alone, in jail... How much more fucked up can He be? I just have to Thank God that I'm gonna be in Here for 7 years. Majority of the guys here may not ever see their families again. Let alone, daylight, vut also a majority of the guys deserve to be here. I Honestly believe I don't belong or need to be here. I need to be at home with Brittny and my kids. But apparently the word "L.O.V.E." in the law means "Loss of Virtually Everything"




Brittny


2 months later


"Jacob Perez. Former child Star, arrested for Child molestation-"


Next channel.


"Princeton from Mindless Behavior Grows to be a pedophile-"


Next Channel. "Ex child Star impregnates 15 year old girl-"


Time to turn the TV off.


You see this shit? I can't escape it. I'll never be able to escape it. This is the most pain I've ever been in. Even more worse than when I was living with my dad and being bullied by Diggy. This shit is heart breaking. Why won't they except the fact that I love Jacob to pieces and he shouldn't be categorized as a molester? Jacob is nothing like those sickos who prey on little 5 year olds. It's only an 8 year difference. Jay Z is roughly more than 10 years older than Beyonce, yet it's perfectly fine that they're married. Society really is a blow. Why can't we all just love who we want to love and whoever doesn't agree with that can have a seat in the 'No one gives a Fuck' corner? I just wanna be free to be honest. I've been locked in my apartment for Months because of all the media That's trying to get a word from me. I find it ironic how all of a sudden people remember Mindless Behavior. Now they're getting just as much publicity as they were getting when they were actually a group. Multiple comments on media take out are like "OMG Princeton is so sexy, but He likes Fetuses."


I obviously don't think that shits funny. My mom is telling me to keep my distance from any social networks though, because if I slip up and say anything to defend myself, That's just another story in the papers.


I laid in my bed with my head against my headboard. I cried so much that it seems like I couldn't anymore. I actually did all the crying I needed. I can't keep crying because I have to still stay strong, but crying is also another way of showing my stregnth. I know I always say I'm done with crying, but hopefully this time I actually am. I'm just gonna have to deal with the fact that Jacob won't be around anymore. I just laid down as I tried to get the little sleep that I can, since the triplets were asleep. I love my babies to death, but the crying and diaper changing is almost impossible for me to handle alone. Thank God for my mom. But overall, they are good babies. Jacob and Jacobi are identical, but they take after Their father so much in different ways. The babies are now 4 months old and have more personality than your average person.


Jay is just as playful as his dad and Cobi is just as loud as his dad. They grew a lot more, but Eerin is still the smallest. Eerin is really a gift. She's my little bundle of joy. It's very easy to make her laugh, She's not as whiny as a Baby should be. My mom says it's fine that she doesn't cry as much, but I still have my concerns.


These babies have been the light of my life, But it would be nice to have their father here to help me out.


"Baby girl..." My mom opened my room door. "How you feeling?" She asked as she walked over to Cobi's Crib. She smiled as she watched him sleep.


"I'm good..." I said in a dull tone.


"Baby girl, you can't stay in your bed all day." She nudged my Foot. I just stared off into a daze just ignoring her. I wasn't really up for talking.


"Ma, I'm just tired right now, just..."


"Brittny... I have something to tell you." She cut me off.


"What is it, ma?" I rolled my eyes and sighed.


"Those news reporters are gone now. You can leave the house!" It's sounds like she wants me to leave. Why can't she just understand that I just want to sleep right now.


"Great..." I put on a fake smile and turned over in my bed.


"C'mon Brittny." She sat at the edge of my bed. "Let's get the babies out for some air! It's summer time, let's get them out!" She tugged at my leg. I didn't reply, I just dug my head deeper into my blanket. I could tell she was getting frustrated with me.


"I'll just call Joey and tell him to bring Diggy over. We haven't seen him in months. I miss him." She said.


We haven't seen Diggy in a few months because all the news reporters were blocking my building trying to get a word out of me or a picture of the twins. Plus, Seeing Diggy might bring back old feelings and then some. I really don't want That happening... again.


"Ma, just leave me alone. I don't want any company. I just wanna sleep."
Right after I said that Eerin started to whine. "Oh my God.." I husked as I got out my bed and walked over to her Crib.


My mom watched me as I reached my arms into her crib and picked her up. I gently rested her head on my shoulder as I tried to rock her back to sleep. Her little curls touched my chin while she cradle her head into my neck. Being a mother, is the toughest job ever. I Honestly think guys wouldn't be able to handle it. But I'm getting the hang of it little by little. Since I've practically been on lockdown, I haven't seen Brandy. I really miss her, and I really wanna see Cassie. We talk on the phone all the time, but I still miss hanging with her. I also miss Roger. I heard He and Brandy have been getting close. I hope they become a couple, or have they already?


"I'm proud of you, Baby girl." My mom said.


I narrowed my eyes at her and asked "Why?"
She stood up from my bed.


"Well, You're teaching yourself, to start off." She slowly began walking towards where I was standing with Eerin. "I Honestly don't know any girl your age who can hustle like this." She rested her hand on my shoulder.


I smiled and looked down at Eerin. She was distracted by a piece of my hair that was dangling by my ear and her eyes were wide open. She was fully awake now.


"Welp. She ain't sleeping anytime soon." I giggled.


"Maybe I should leave you two alone to have some Mommy daughter time." My mom said.


She kissed me and Eerin's foreheads and made her way out my room carefully closing the door so the boys wouldn't wake up. I continued to stroll around my room with her. She then started giggling.


"What you laughing at, Babe?" I tickled her little belly.


I never knew I would actually admire my daughter as much as I do. She's absolutely beautiful. Her small curly Afro, short round head, little button nose, and her eyes. Sad to say, she has my dad's eyes. That's practically one trait I didn't take after from my dad, besides that, I look exactly like him. My dad has light brown eyes, and Eerin took right after him. Eerin is a little lighter than me, but She's not considered light skinned. She's medium toned. She's just my little perfection. I just can't wait till She's 8 months so I can Pierce her ears. It sucks that her dad won't see her. He won't see her first steps, He won't hear her first words... nothing. Another blow, is that me and him won't be in contact at all. The law wants me to stay away from him until I'm 18.


Why does this have to be a crime? I'm sick of complaining about it.... I sat back down on my bed with Eerin. I laid her down as I played with her. Tickling her and making silly faces to make her laugh. Her laugh is like music to my ears. We played for a while then my phone rang. I reached over on my night stand to get it. I looked at the caller ID and it was Chresanto.


"Hello?"


"Hey, Punky. How you feeling today?" He asked.


I sighed "I'm holding up..."


"Good. I have great news!" He said. "Jacob's mom is in the city. She's coming over there later to see you and the babies."


My heart literally skipped a beat. Jacob's mom is coming. I feel happy, nervous, and scared all at the same time.


"Really?" I asked him for assurance.


"Yeah, but don't be nervous. She's sweet. She really wants to meet you and help out with the babies. She said She's gonna be down here for a week. She wants to visit Jacob too."


Yes! She's gonna visit Jacob! I should write a letter and give it to her to give him. Oh this is gonna be great! I wanna give him some pics of the triplets. I know He really wants to know what they look like and he'd be surprised by how much they look like him. I'm just so excited.


"Okay, Okay! So what time will she be down here?" I excitedly asked.


"She didn't say specifically what time, but later on today." He told me.


I was a little bummed, because I hate when I don't know anything specifically. What if she comes and I'm still lounging around in my PJ's? Unacceptable. I have to look appropriate and mature when I meet Jacob's mom.


"Don't be worried. Me, Ray and Craig will be down there to help with the awkwardness." He chuckled through the phone.


I smiled in relief and looked at the time on the cable box. It was almost 5 o'clock. I'm not sure when she'll be here, but I'm gonna take a shower and get something decent out to wear.




Narrator


While Brittny was getting ready for Jacob's mother, Little did she know that Teresa was on her way to visit Jacob first. It was sort of like a first task for Teresa to see her son before anything. Driving on the small bridge That connects Rikers Island to Manhattan was all like a nightmare too real. She'd always pushed Jacob to be better than everyone. If it wasn't just in dancing, she wanted him to be successful and off the streets for sure. Somehow, Jacob seemed to combine her fears and hers dreams: A successful criminal. She knew Jacob always had a thing for younger girls. He'd always bring home a girl no more than 3 years younger than him, but Teresa never knew his fetish would go this far. It's not that she doesn't like Brittny, she just thinks that it was dumb of her to be sneaking around with her teacher.


Arriving at the the large gated jail compound was scary to her. It felt like she was on one of those Lockdown shows. At the entrance, there was armed security guarding the doors. Stopping her car and slowly coming out, she glanced up at the large building knowing that out of the hundreds of inmates in there, her son was one of them. It broke her heart.


"Here I go..." She took a deep breathe.


Closing her car door, she walked towards the guards.


"Two forms of ID and drivers license, ma'am." the larger guard asked from her.


Teresa swiftly went into her purse and pulled out what was asked for.


"Follow me, ma'am." He instructed her. Nervously, Teresa Followed the large guard.


Walking down a white brick hall, They came to a stop at a window and metal detector.


"All, keys, watches, phones, belts in this bin." He handed the bin to her. "Shoes off." He instructed.


Teresa placed all her items into the bin and took off her sandals. The guard slid the bin and her identification to a worker behind the window. "Go through the scanning." The guard told Teresa. Thank goodness she didn't ring off. Teresa nervously grabbed her things and put Everything back on. On the other side of the metal detector Everything is open in plain view. Guards were walking back and forth, inmates sashayed around. All this was seen through a thin glass. A tear managed to come for her eyes.


"Who are you here for?" The worker asked. "Jacob... Jacob Perez." She shyly spoke.


Teresa isn't the best at having self esteem and confidence, which is what she has most in common with Brittny. Ever since Jacob's dad practically hit and ran, Her self esteem level has been at it's lowest for 23 years.


"Can you please wait a moment in the waiting area." The Worker pointed her to a small area already occupied by 5 other people.


Teresa sighed and walked over to an open seat in the area. It was all so scary for her. A million thoughts were wandering her mind as she took her seat. She was just trying to imagine the stress Jacob is going through behind those bars. Teresa always beats herself up over his wrong doings. She always blames herself for not being a good enough mother.


"Now look where I am...." Teresa mumbled to herself. Scanning the waiting area, there were other visitors seemingly sad also. She felt the same as them. This place is depressing... She hopes Jacob is still sane. After 20 silent minutes of waiting, a correction officer finally called Teresa to the window.


"Teresa Perez, Jacob will be here in a minute. Just walk over to that Booth over there."


Teresa shook her head and proceeded to the Booth. She fiddled with her fingers as she nervously sat down. She wondered nervously if Jacob is still the sweet Ambitious boy who left LA 5 years ago. She just misses her little boy, and it's killing her that She sees him behind bars. Waiting anxiously, looking through the glass window, She saw a hefty short white guard escorting Jacob out roughly. If Teresa could, She would break the glass window and beat the shit out of that guard for roughly handling her son. But from the looks of it, Jacob was barely flinching by the guards actions. Catching eye contact with each other, Teresa wanted to brawl out and cry. He always had facial hair, but never grew it out to a shadow. I was weird seeing his face not shaven. His hair was pulled into a ponytail and dark circles surrounded his eyes...


"This isn't my baby..." She sobbed with her hand covering her mouth...