Cafe Musain Oneshots

Rat Bastard - Enjolras/Grantaire

platonic!enjolras/grantaire (canon era)

summary: where enj is too handsome for his own good and grantaire comes to the rescue (sort of)

warnings: none

a/n: this was what i could scrummage from my singular empty braincell and flu haze so its a bit short forgive me

requested by Enjolras_IRL_18

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

It was a well known fact among the group that Enjolras, their fearless leader of the rebellion, was terrible around women. Unluckily for him, he happened to be constantly surrounded by them. The women were like birds, and him the unfortunate piece of bread they had set their sights upon. There were situations that happened far too often to be considered coincidence, that the boys would bring over a date, and said date had instantly left them behind to fawn over him. Courfeyrac had flicked him on the forehead one day, expressing his plans to make use of his "stunning beauty" to help in his escapades. He would not have to do anything, just that Enjolras be mentioned by name that he would join Courf's outings and the women would come flocking in their prettiest petticoats and silk bonnets. Only to be met with disappointment when Courfeyrac regretfully explained that Enjolras simply could not make it. It worked like a charm, much to his displeasure.

But he did not despise women. He was just terrible. The man who regularly, passionately gave rousing speeches of the country's failing economic and political state to crowds of people at a time cannot handle women on his own.

Grantaire likes to call the phenomenon, "The Marble Statue,"

Which is what he sees now from where he sits idle in the corner of the Cafe Musain. No meetings were scheduled for that day, R was always known to lurk there, which is how he came upon Les Amis in the beginning. And now, the state of affairs.

Enjolras had been approached by not one, not two, but three young women. He never did take religion seriously, but he believed it must have been a bad omen. He would willingly pray to any god out there to pluck him out of this situation and get him back home to his apartment. One of the women, a pretty brunette by the name of Marguerite who had fallen for Courfeyrac's clever ruse, was adamant on meeting him. And by chance she had recognized Enjolras while she was out with her two companions as he strolled along the path towards the cafe.

And now here he was, The Marble Statue. Stiff, cold and totally out of place. Conversation came easily for her, whilst he answered in short quipped sentences, his jaw clenched staring daggers at his feet. Was there always that scratch there? He would have to take a closer look sometime...

"Monsieur?" She called, a worried tone in her voice. His head snapped up instantly, humming his reply.

The young woman thought nothing of his uncouth behaviour, fiddling with the tips of her gloves as she repeated her question.

"Would you be willing to join us at the Cafe?" She angled her chin towards Musain. "I noticed we were headed in the same direction and thought...why not? Especially since we did not get the chance the last time."

Without thinking, Enjolras nodded.

He realised too late the boiling water he had dunked himself in, silently screaming bloody murder in his head as he walked behind the giggling trio. The blond's arms braced rigidly to his sides, marching like a soldier being sent off to war. Meanwhile, Grantaire who had speculated this all from inside sat with a hand plastered over his mouth to stop himself from howling with laughter at Enjolras' incredibly gaunt look of distress.

R waited for him to walk through the door, forearms resting against the tabletop. The three women were tittering amongst themselves as to where they should sit, Enjolras' distracting himself by averting his attention on the people inside.

Anyone. Somebody he could recognise and rescue him. He did not care for who, just need to get out of here...

His eyes fell upon the curly haired ravenet, who met his gaze with an impish grin.

That will do.

Before Enjolras could begin to formulate a plan to slip by him, Grantaire excitedly waved his hand in the air, beckoning him over.

"Enjolras, my good friend!" He called out, drawing a few curious eyes from the tables near him.

Firstly, they would not exactly call the other, friends. If being a friend meant coming to meetings to yell obscenities and bring down morale as the local skeptic, then maybe they were really the best of friends after all. He took note of R's appearance, clean and kempt in comparison to when he barged into meetings. Approachable. And he did approach, Grantaire standing up and bounding over to clap a hand over Enjolras' shoulder in a friendly manner.

"Come, we must catch up. I feel it's been a lifetime since we have last seen each other." He laughed whole-heartedly. Relief flooded Enjolras, perhaps even a tinge of gratefulness for once for this man, beginning to lead him back towards his table in the corner. But his escape was cut short as Grantaire did not move from his spot, now bringing his attention to the three women.

"And are you not going to introduce me to the lovely dames?" Grantaire exclaimed, tipping his head in greeting which earned him a few giggles. He made a show of clasping Marguerite's outstretched hand and placing a delicate kiss on the back of it.

Rat bastard.

"Please, forgive Enjolras, Mademoiselle. Believe me when I say that he is just brimming with exhilaration." Grantaire beamed, slapping Enjolras on the back beckoning him closer. "He hones incredible skill at hiding his enthusiasm."

Enjolras's head snapped to scowl at his profile as the women laughed.

"May we ask for your name, Monsieur?" One of them asked, the auburn-haired one who was presently batting her eyelashes in Grantaire's direction. He put a fist to his chest, bowing gracefully.

"Georges Grantaire," He said. "But feel free to call me R. That is how I am known around here."

"So you must come here often, Monsieur R?" Marguerite asked.

Grantaire nodded, jutting his head in the direction of the bar. "The Madame owner of this establishment must be sick of my constant presence by now. And please, just R. No need for formalities here."

She smiled approvingly. "Then surely you know where the best seat of the house is? If so, may we sit with you?"

"You did not even have to ask." Grantaire grinned, looping an arm around Enjolras' shoulder. "How delightful, do you agree Alexandre?"

Enjolras felt all eyes fall on him in anticipation, and he inwardly cursed all four of them.

"Charmed." He said through a tight lipped smile.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

a/n: first chapter done and dusted! now time to write the three other requests :) 

which are always open lovelies!