Razor is Not Just a Puppy

8

"Better?" Razor asked the bundle of blankets. He held out a mug of hot cocoa and watched it disappear into the bundle. Inhuman noises responded to him. 

"Leave Bennett alone now," Razor moved to stand up but a hand popped out of the bundle and grabbed his sleeve. He stayed seated. The hand moved from his sleeve to his hand, intertwining their fingers. 

"What does Bennett want?" Razor asked. "Bennett want girlfriend and marriage? No need to answer now..." Razor looked away from the bundle. "Let me know...later..." he spoke softly. 

Bennett stared at Razor in a small hole the blankets formed. He looked sad. Bennett didn't want  Razor to be sad. But, he also didn't want to feel as if he was forcing Razor to attach himself to him and only him. He felt guilty being Razor's only friend and guilty for wanting it to stay that way. 

"I love Bennett," Razor turned back to look at the bundle. He somehow knew exactly where Bennett's eyes were when he said it. "Bennett is most important. Bennett is everything." He looked down at their hands and squeezed Bennett's before letting go. He stood up and went over to his bag, pulled out a letter, and placed it on Bennett's desk. "Will understand... if Bennett doesn't feel the same..." He picked up his bag and exited the room. Bennett didn't move. He drank his cocoa, not processing what Razor said. 

Outside the door, Razor leaned up against the wall, sliding down to sit on the ground. He hugged his knees, sobbing quietly, feeling rejected before he'd even gotten his feelings across. He didn't want a girlfriend. He wanted Bennett. He didn't want to get married unless it was Bennett. He didn't want to share a home with anyone but Bennett and he didn't want a family if Bennett wasn't there. But it didn't matter what he wanted because Bennett wanted something different. 

"Bennett doesn't want Razor..." he stood up and wiped the tears from his eyes with the base of his hand. He left Bennett's house to return to his own. 

...

Bennett wanted to read the letter, he did, but every time he walked over to his desk he didn't open it. He left it closed and went about his day. Those days turned into weeks. Razor stayed away from him and he couldn't look him in the eyes. He had to let him go grow up properly. Without him. He needed to socialize better. So he didn't read the letter, scared of what it might say. And he also couldn't remember what Razor had said. He just remembered his salty tears mixing with the cocoa. 

"Did something happen with you and Razor?" Xingqiu asked. Bennett had been eerily quiet. And he never answered the question. 

Walking home was difficult without Razor to keep him company. He zoned out a lot. Today was no different. Bennett slammed his nose into someone's back. 

"Hey, watch where you're- oh, kid, you don't look so good," the stranger knelt down. "You alright?" Bennett didn't answer but he also didn't refuse the stranger's kind words. He followed him to the nearest bench without thinking and accepted his vending machine drink too. 

"What's eating you?" 

"I can't talk to my best friend." 

"That sucks." 

"We've been attached at the hip for as long as I can remember but he got tall and attractive while I'm still the same. I don't think I'm good enough to be his best friend anymore." 

"Hm, well, what does he think?" 

"Huh?" Bennett looked up. He hadn't gotten a good look at the stranger before. Now he noticed his blue hair and covered eye. The man looked as if he never learned how to button up his shirt. 

"Let me tell you a little secret about people, kid," he leaned his arm on the bench and scooted closer to Bennett. "They're not mind-readers. If you don't make your feelings known and talk everything out the situation won't change." 

"But, I've started to look at him differently. What if he thinks that's weird?" 

"The way it's going now it looks as if you might never talk to him again." 

"That's not true! We're best friends!" 

"How long has it been since you've talked? No, since you've even looked him in the eye?" 

Bennett froze, not wanting to admit it. 

"Let me tell you a story," the stranger smiled, lifting his finger. "Once upon a time, a very long long time ago, there were two brothers. One was adopted into the family but the real son was suuuuuuper friendly. The two brothers got along nicely until one day an accident happened. The adopted brother got hurt and the real son blamed himself. The two stopped talking. 'I'll talk to him about it tomorrow' the adopted son kept telling himself. But each time he tried the real son walked the other way. Until eventually the one who was injured stopped trying altogether." 

"Is this a true story?" 

"Hm, who can say?" the stranger shrugged. "Don't stop talking, okay?" 

He stood up and brushed the dirt off of his pants and then walked away. Bennett stared after him. The stranger walked by a particular store and paused, hand hovering over the doorknob, but didn't enter. He placed his hand into his pocket and walked again. The door opened and a redhead ran out. He looked left and then right and ran after the stranger. 

Bennett didn't wait to see if the redhead caught up. He stood and ran in the other direction. He couldn't bear to see an unhappy ending. So he ran and he ran all the way home. He picked up the letter. 

"I'm going to read it this time," he said, determined.