If I cleaned everything ||DreamNotFound

Atelphobia

Atelphobia- the fear of not being good enough.

Song rec-
In my head- bedroom

⚠️TWS at bottom⚠️

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                             Dreams POV

    Dream liked the way cigarettes smell and taste. The way it burns his throat as he inhales the smoke. The way he felt immense dizziness from inhaling too much. How the chemicals are deteriorating his lungs. It's slowly killing him and he found weird comfort in that. The first time dream started smoking was at 17. Him and his friends were fucking around and smoking at a park. Dream always wanted to try it even if it was "bad". It's not horrible it's not weed or anything, just nicotine. Dream stills remembers the first inhale. How he felt so much adrenaline rush to his head. However as fast as it came it went away. Making him crave the feeling again and again.

He stills remembers having to tell George and Sapnap about the minor addiction. It was a few weeks later and he only smoked a few more times. Until his mother smelled the smell cigarette seeping into the kitchen and took dreams phone and computer. He had to explain why he was gone for a week and grounded for a month. They went full on dad mode telling dream he's being a idiot and how it is harmful, so on. Dream soon forgot about the addicting sticks of chemicals and went on with his life until now. He needed a high even if it only lasted a few seconds. He knew this was a dangerous game to be playing with but he could care less.

   Dream was too caught up looking at the stars to hear the outside door creaking. However, he did hear the sigh coming from his lifelong friend. "Are you really this mad about George not telling you?" Nick said in a quiet voice. "No, I just wanted to smoke for fun." I replied in a snappy voice. Sapnap looked at me and frowned. "Dream you know he didn't mean to hurt you. The cigarettes aren't doing you any good and I know you know that." He seems really upset. "Nick, I'm fine. I just wanted to smoke one not the whole pack." I know he's trying to help me but it's really starting to annoy me. "Dream I love you man but I don't want to see you go down hill with these."

   "I promise I won't." I reply with a smile. Sapnap looks at his phone mumbling a quick "shit" I look at him confused. "I have to go to the airport really soon but I promise we can talk more when I get home man. Get some sleep it's 4 in the morning." Right. He's leaving. I fear he's gonna forget about me this next week and a half. I'll just sit and watch them meet up and be filled with joy. Great. I nod my head to him. He gets up quickly and gives me a hug. It's crazy that we met on a dumb Minecraft server and now he's living with me. He's my platonic soulmate. He will always be my soulmate.

I say a quick goodbye and then he's off to go visit our best friends in London. The only comfort other than these dumb cigarettes is leaving. I mean I did have comfort but the accident happened and I'll never forgive myself. Why couldn't I have noticed. I quickly light another cigarette. I wish my comfort wasn't harming myself in some way.

                                  Time skip

                             Sapnap's POV

     Im really excited to see my friends however I don't want to leave dream behind. Speaking of dream, why has he started to acting so different? He has every right to be mad at George for lying. But I think this has a different meaning than just being hurt. However, George has been acting different as well. He's stopped calling and streaming, he only answers in short responses, and he didn't tell Dream about his girlfriend. But why?