The Spy Who Shagged Me: A One Direction Story.

Chapter 11.

 Mmm. So warm. And cuddly. And... hairy? 

I sit bolt upright. Since when did I last sprout chest hair and rock-hard abs? Oh wait, turns out I'm feeling up the wrong damn body. 

The body which seems to be moving underneath my hands.  At this moment, the whole bed seems to shift and all of a sudden I'm flipped over, to be lying right on top of the- may I say- magnificently sculpted chest. 

"Morning." He drawls in my ear, sending a waft of warm breath over my face. 

"MY GOD YOU STINK. UGH. GO BRUSH YOUR TEETH NOW!." I scream equally annoyingly in his ear.  

I rolled off him and Asshole moans at the sudden loss of warmth.  

"No way in the most fiery pits of hell would I endure that horror ever again." With that, I grab the nearest vase of elaborately arranged peonies and proceed to dump them swiftly over his impossibly stylish bed-hair.  

"Holy mother of...Oh you're in for it." With that, he leaps off the bed with a predatory leap. This results in a cat-and-mouse game. We circle the coffee table in the lounge, waiting for someone to make a move. Little does he know, the pretty Brazilian model, that I was trained for this kind of thing. 

"Come here you little..."

He lunges for me in one swift move. Unfortunately for him, I was swifter.  Somehow I managed to leap on his back just as he was reaching me and I clutched onto his neck with a death grip. Leaning down I whisered into his ear, "You may think this is fun and games, asshole, but you need to realise that you're going to tell me- and very soon- just why I'm here and what you know about this whole mess." 

The next thing he did surprsied me. My ninja skills may well be  impressive, but he was quicker. In one mover he dislodged my hands and slid me around so that I was effectively clutching him front on. 

"Asshole? Is that how you refer to me sweetheart?" He grins. 

"Well yes, it is a fitting name for some like you." I reply 

"Someone like me? Overwhelmingly hansome and charming to boot?" 

"No. Someone who is a dick and lies to kidnap innocent girls from their boyfriends." The reminder of Harry sends a pang of guilt and hurt right down to my stomach. I unlatched my legs from his waist and his down to the ground. 

He let out a strange wince, but quickly covered it up. Huh, don't know what that was about.

"That idiot was your boyfriend? Sorry love, but a guy who sees you with someone else and just walks away can't lcare for you too much can he?" He must have seen the flash of pain that filled my eyes for one brief second, as he swiftly changed subject. 

"Now get ready, we're going shopping."  

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Damn. His godlike looks are pssing me off. 

Do all  of the girls in this street have to gape at him so openly that my fist would easily fit in, punch-like style? He wlaks with a small grin as if he knows the open adoration of almost everyone else- and I don't mean just girls- admires he perfection.

Not to mention Asshole has thought its a great idea to keep me in the dark as to why we are going shopping in the first place. The pile of dog poo notices that and a chuckle escapes his throat, his eyes shining as he turns away from me. Bastard.

We wander for a few minutes down the busy high-end street down from the hotel. The street is lined with a series of boutiques- the ones where you would expect to see Kimmy Kardaschund and her friends prancing about with their overly-large credit cards. So, me being the thoroughly middle class girl that I am, fully didn't expect Asshole to push me into the rotating doors of one of them. Assuming he was just up for a game of touchy-feelies, I decide to take full advantage of the opportunities that Asshole's perfectly toned biceps afforded. I let my fingers brush slightly from his shoulder, skimming to his fingertips. The rest there lightly, before he surprises me once again by threading his rough and textures fingers through mine. I am half wanting to rip my hand from his and shove him into the gutter, but his big baby blue eyes catch mine. Noticing the warning shining in them, I leave the moment pass.