Champagne Problems 「︎Corpse Husband + Dream」︎

thirty four

do you even want me?
c h a m p a g n e p r o b l e m s

"I've done this before on my channel with Sapnap and George; if you haven't seen it, you can—"

"Okay we didn't agree on self promo."

Lilith burst out laughing.

"You're ruining the surprise, Corpse. Let me introduce the video."

"This is still my channel."

"And you wanted me to do the intro!" As the boys bickered over the intro, Lilith already had tears in her eyes from laughing. She sat in Dream's lap as Corpse sat next to them; her hand shared the keyboard with Corpse as Dream's was on the mouse. "As I was saying—"

"Leave that in, leave all this in—"

"Oh, don't worry," Corpse scoffed. "Dream will be exposed. We'll show the world how poorly he treats us."

"Caught in 4K," Lilith laughed and Dream pinched her side so hard she squealed and kicked her heel back into his leg.

"We're doing two challenges in one," Dream said as he ignored the other two who still laughed in the background. "Me, George, and Sapnap just did a challenge where we were one body and beat Minecraft. George and Sapnap also did a challenge beating Minecraft where one controlled the mouse and one controlled the keyboard. Today, me, Lilith, and Corpse are—" Dream broke his sentence and laughed when Lilith reached behind and tickled him since she thought he was being too serious. "—doing both of these challenges at the same time."

"Let's just do it!" Lilith cried as the screen went up and down and up and down; she was in control of the shift key.

"Oh my god, let me explain—I will be using the mouse, Corpse is navigating, and Lilith is jumping, crouching, and using inventory."

"Let's go!" She cried and when Corpse moved them forward, she started jumping again.

"This is going to take so fucking long, so get a snack or something."

"You doubting our skills?" Lilith gasped.

"Absolutely."

And Dream was right. It did take so fucking long. Two hours later and they were still in the nether.

"I swear to god I am going to rip my eyeballs out if we have to see this same wall again."

"This same wall?" Corpse cried. "I'm so lost, where did we even come from?"

"Up here," Dream groaned. Lilith's stomach hurt from laughing so hard. She had finished the game plenty of times; she finished it with Dream, Sapnap and George's help the most. But Corpse had barely played. He didn't know how to make the basic tools. They climbed up the stairs in the fortress and Dream forced them right and left and right again down a narrow hallway.

"Dream, I don't think the spawner will be—"

"Oh," Corpse said as he cut Lilith off. There ahead of them was the blaze spawner and all of their stuff was around it.

"Jesus Christ, these fucking kids—" Dream rambled on under his breath as he turned them across al their stuff to pick it up.

"Let me rearrange it so we know where everything—"