It's Not Finished Yet

Chapter 7

Hayat's POV

21 July 2021
01:39 AM

Dear Diary,

Eid-Ul-Adha Mubarak.

Chand Mubarak actually, as eid is tomorrow morning. I just completed applying henna on my hands. I wasn't in the mood to, but welp! Periods can make you turn up in seconds. Yeah, it is my first day today. Periods suck on a festival. I don't wanna ruin my new suit :'(

Anyways, I usually listen to songs while applying henna to pass time easily without getting tired. So, in the midst of the playlist, the song 'shayad' brought back many memories.

I am missing him.
Again.

I always try not to think about him, but he keeps on popping up in my mind one way or the other. It's been 2 months and 10 days since we last talked.

I am not counting days, Duh!

I know that because that's the gap between 'Eid-Ul-Fitr' and 'Eid-Ul-Adha'.

I don't know what should I call this feeling. Sometimes I don't think about him at all, and sometimes he is all I can think of.

Just like now.

Maybe it's because of mood swings? Plus sad songs and a lonely night.

Am I in love with him?
Or am I just missing him?

I'm just going crazy I guess. It's not love. I'm just missing him that's it. But why?

Why him?

So many friends came and went, but no one lingered in the back of my mind like him. No one pops up in every small thing, every song, every talk, like him.

I don't want to name this feeling 'love'.

You know what? In today's time, everyone has gotten a coward in the context of loving someone. They don't have the guts, to take the risk and responsibility.

I haven't met a single guy who is brave enough to fall in love and abide by it. Take complete responsibility, and say that 'yes, I do love you a lot, and I will try my best to make you mine.' That man, who have guts, who is ready to take a stand for you, and who never leaves you alone.

I guess he hasn't come yet.
Stuck on his way?
Where the heck are you!?
Just come already!

I don't know if I'm hopelessly romantic or what? But I believe my soulmate will come one day, who will love me fearlessly and cherish me.

But at the same time, it feels so unreal. Will someone love me this much and go head over heels for me? Do I really deserve it? Or does it only happens in movies, novels, and poems? Just in fiction life?

Maybe I shouldn't even expect from him too. Because expectation gives pain and nothing else.

So, I just have hope in almighty that's it. I only ask him because he never fails to give anything.

Okay, I'm off to sleep. It's 2:13 AM already. Bye~

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A week passed

Since yesterday morning I'm having a cough. I thought it would go away but in vain. So I decided to have a spoonful of honey.

It does wonders.

As I savored its taste, I remembered how he was making excuses because he forgot to take honey for his cough.