Pleasing

<40

JENNIFER POV

I put some chapstick on, peach cream smoothie. My feet slip into my slides, and I sigh. I look at my lazy self in the mirror.

Focus on your own actions.

I fidget with my outfit distracting myself while my phone rings. Vinny.

My hand had the mind of its own. It's only Vin, even though he used me as well, maybe he wasn't in on it.
  I press answer and he already was screaming of happiness. "Aye Manuel come here NOW!" He screams, he was facing timing me that's why..

  "Vinny what'd- I'm so glad to see you! You scared us but then we heard you went to your hometown and we're so glad you're safe and chilling- give me my baby doll you fucktard!" I hear and the phone gets snatched causing me to widen my eyes by the language.

  "Hey little bunny! How's life without ME? HORRIBLE right? I know." He sighs sarcastically. "It's- it's been okay how are you guys?" I ask biting my lip. "Horrible! Z has been up our asses!" He groans and I frown "why?" I ask out of habit. "He's been just upset he probably misses you. He's back to the old grumpy him so now he doesn't let anything pass. We miss you!" Vinny interrupts.

  My eyebrows furrow and I frown. I've been making Marcel be mean to people. Why!

"Well guys, I wanted to just say I'm sorry for assuming. I've been thinking and-and.. I- at this point it's a necklace. You guys called me and.. checked up on me.- of course we fucking care! Who do we look like? Tavante? Nah Babygirl no." Amanuel gasps and I laugh softly. "Stop guys. That's mean." And I earn a groan from them.

   "I'll be coming back in 2 days so Friday... maybe we can- have a movie night and throw up but not by alcohol because you don't drink but candy and junk food and have a nonalcoholic hangover causing you to stay the night so we can do it again and again? Sounds amazing, love the idea, Doll." Vin scrambled and i laughed loudly not holding it in. "Vin! That sounds crazy!" I giggle and he rolls his eyes.
     "I have to go guys, but we can have a movie night, but I was thinking lunch or something following your idea I guess." I shrug and they all yell cheering in French. "Bye guys.." I smile softly before hanging up.

I can text Marcel tomorrow... about- no he won't want to... wouldn't he te- no he told me to. Am I even ready? My body is... but my mind! Ugh why are you so confusing! Pick something please. I miss him! God, I miss him so badly.

  Why did I leave?

I can't even hate him. It's such a strong word of hatred. All I've been feeling is just cravings of him. Not sexually!

I walk out my room and see the boys ready while Grammy was sitting in her chair eating her carrot soup with the romance book that she has probably read 24 times.
Time for shopping.

We head to the mall, and we all agreed to kohl's first, but I was quickly distracting by Barns and Noble.

"Let's pick a book out for Grammy!" I say quickly dragging them along and they groan. I shush them once we quickly got into the store and was quick to the romance section while they checked the mystery.
   I picked 4 good books, Sarah Dessen. The boys come back with 2 each and I smile out of success. "Alright I'll take them to the cashier." I mumble and they nod.

  I pay for the books and slide them into the reusable bag. What? Save the earth, taktskksskks. Kidding. Maybe not... I don't know.
"Let's get Grey some um.. new slides." Jay teases at his run-down sandals. "Those are like 5 years old G." I whisper not wanting to be mean. "I'm picky okay! Shut up." He huffs but I smile softly reassuring him it's okay and we walk to each shoe store until we got him 2 pairs.

  25 so it was a good deal. We're not rich rich but we're middle class!

  And it was then Jays turn for a roast down. "You need new shades, shorts because you wear those every day! And some new socks." Grey says crossing his arms and I cover my mouth in shock. "Whatever." He mumbles not even denying it. "I know the perfect store! Target." I say confidently.

  With these two I never get... nervous or stutter a lot. They make me feel safe. Like I have time and time to answer, and no negative reaction will come out. It's because it's the truth they were never mad.

"We didn't find anything! Jenny... you're our tour guide okay. We need better! You're at a C+." Jay says slowly as if I was a kid. I cross my arms and pout. "I'm trying! I haven't been here for a long time!" I frown and they just chuckle from my reaction and continue to tease.

  "Let's go to... Marshall's!" I smile and they nod.

Today will be a long day..

We stop for food, and I finally sit down into a booth. These slides aren't walking shoes..

  I get Taco Bell just some Dorito shells. While we wait in line, I decide to take a quick pic with Jay as he looks down at his phone. "Jay! Look- ugh." I huff seeing him not look up. I do a quick insta story about us getting tacos.

"And Grey over here for the most boring meal ever! Fries and a milkshake. Not even strawberry just plain vanilla.. with no whipped cream or sprinkles." I tease and he gasps munching on a French fry. "How rude!" He says and I smile softly with a giggle before ending it.

I rewatched everything single memory from today. And every photo we took, or I got. I miss mom. So much.