Before My Withering [枯萎之前]

Chapter 37

I sat in bed from three o'clock till morning, when the increasing palpitations drove me to return to my room and take my medication. I got out of bed and removed the disc.

I didn't notice there were two packs of cigarettes behind the book-like thingy in the drawer when I took it.

I'd never seen Zhou Chen smoke, and I'd never smelled smoke at home. Was this his?

During the night, the human spirit was usually at its most vulnerable. I couldn't help but assume that if this wasn't Zhou Chen's, someone had slept in it and left their cigarette behind.

Was it his ex? Did they live together?

My heart became filled with an indescribable tanginess.

Zhou Shen was thirty-one years old, and his love life was anything from dull. The idea that he may have told someone else that he loved them made me sadder than the fact that I ran into Qi Shu when he was sleeping with Wen Ziqing.

But who was I to judge his past...

In a trance, I went downstairs, and Mr. Butler was tidying up the flowers and plants on the balcony. I met him and wished him a good morning, and then I couldn't help wondering if Zhou Chen had brought someone back here.

Mr. Butler was taken aback and stated that he had never done anything like this before, and he wondered how I could have thought so.

"I found two packets of cigarettes in his room," I explained.

"That should be Sir's," He smiled with relief, with an expression of "What's wrong with me", and said, "Sir used to smoke once in a while, but he suddenly quit one day. When I asked, I found out it was because you're not supposed to smell second-hand smoke because of your heart disease."

Zhou Chen... smoked? I had no idea, even though we'd known each other for so long. And he just stopped since second-hand smoking was bad for me...

I was still speculating about his past here...

I was overcome with shame and guilt, followed by intense yearning.

Zhou Chen did not specify how long this work trip would go, but I feel that if I did not express my desire for him to return, he would continue to be "busy."

I decided to leave him alone till the afternoon because it was seven o'clock in the morning and already midnight in Cologne.

I returned to the room after taking the medication and drinking a large glass of water, ready to deal with the traces of my shifting so as not to be detected by Zhou Chen.

Unexpectedly, I picked up a book.

I said it was a book, but it was more like a diary, hefty and leather-bound.

On the first page, there was a photo of me as a kid, maybe about five or six years old, swinging in a local park.

There was a line of words from Zhou Chen. 【Finally found him.】

This was his diary.

A few pages later confirmed my suspicions.

【I'm wondering if returning to the Song family would be good to him. After all, Song Zhiqian is his biological father, and robbing someone is not a smart idea at this time. It's a little troublesome.】

【I went to meet Xiao Yu quietly today. He sat outside the piano area, looking miserable, sobbing, twitching, and not daring to make a sound.

I didn't hold back when it came to comforting him. He's a nice small boy. Even while he was crying like this, he didn't forget to say thank you gege.