Before My Withering [枯萎之前]

Chapter 15

[Don't be a lover again. Be a cat, be a dog, but not a lover]

The sun was shining bright the day I was discharged, and I came to realize that it's almost time for summer to arrive.

I received no external contact the entire time I was in the hospital. My only connection with the outside world was the newspaper Zhou Chen would bring everyday. He rather had some very old-fashioned habits, such as cutting out interesting or serviceable content from the newspaper, pasting it on a notebook and showing it to me.

I once jokingly asked how old he'd be this year. He pretended to be serious and scolded how it was impolite to ask about a person's age, then immediately smoothened his brows and answered that he's 31.

Once again, I asked him, are you really a doctor? You don't seem to need to work.

He said he was on leave.

"If you have more questions, please just lump them together." He appeared somewhat helpless.

I had no more questions.

No, there's still one more left.

"You're helping me this much, will Qi Shu..."

"Rest assured." He closed the book in his hands and nonchalantly said, "He isn't capable of doing anything to me."

On the way back, I told him I wished to go to Qi Shu's house again.

Zhou Chen looked at me and instructed the driver to change directions without asking me anything.

It was only early summer yet the roadsides were already covered with lush green vegetation.

Qi Shu's family lived in the downtown's rich area. In the noiseless area of land and gold, his courtyard unrestrainedly occupied half of the block.

The driver parked the car across the street. I got out of the car, took out the already prepared envelope from my pocket and shoved it into the mailbox at the door.

Inside were our contract and the bank card.

So far, all the things Qi Shu gave me, what I wanted and didn't want, were returned to him.

Yet unfortunately, instead of being relaxed as expected, I felt heavy.

When I returned, Zhou Chen was leaning against the car holding an umbrella as he waited for me.

"Not gonna say any goodbye?" He asked.

I pretended to be relaxed. "Dr. Zhou, I'm running away today."

"Just kidding." He pulled open the door and said, "Let's change how you address me bah. It isn't easy for me to have a vacation, I don't want to hear those two words again."

I mused for a moment. "Mr. Zhou?"

He acquiesced.

The vehicle moved slowly, and from the rearview mirror, I saw the house where I had spent countless days and nights gradually retreating to a distance.

I couldn't describe the feeling. It's as if two hands were slowly pulling one bone away from my body without ever refusing. It wasn't painful, but it felt extremely uncomfortable.

"It'll be difficult to get rid of the many years of habits." Zhou Chen opened his mouth and uttered faintly, "There's still time before you completely regret it."

His gaze was unlike his calm-as-still-water tone, but had a rather bout of complexity that I couldn't comprehend.

"I don't have a choice." I said, "I don't have a way to love him anymore."