Midnight Angel H.S COMPLETED

65

HARRY POV

It's coming closer.

I'm really fucking excited.

I don't think the smile has left my face since we left Succo. 

I unlock our front door, Hazel oblivious. There's a rise in my stomach, like a coke bottle about to explode.

"Who the fuck told you that my best mates were allowed to move in Italy?" The south Yorshire accent fills our ears and I can see Hazel's face brigthen up.

I know the surprise isn't big but it gets lonely being in a country without your mates sometimes. I know they're not staying, it's just for the wedding. It's almost midnight so maybe the time and my tiredness is making me more happy.

"Shut up, we're your best mates." Liam says, hitting Louis.

"Well, you can shut the fuck up because that's not true is it?" Louis shrugs Liam off.

Usually I'd want to beat them for bickering but I've missed it, truly.

"You could've moved to Ireland." Niall says and Louis and Liam go silent and stare at him in disappointment.

"Niall, who wants to live in Ireland?" Haze deadpans him and it makes me so happy that Hazel gets along with the boys as much as I do.

"Every sane person out there." He replies with the same attitude.

No one replies to him, we all just stare. He looks around wondering why we're all staring but I'll be honest, what he just said right there was probably the most bullshit I've heard in awhile.

Louis hits him the the balls and he pinches his eyes shut. "What. The. Fuck. Like I've said again and again, I. Want. Kids." Niall complains in pain.

"Don't want your kids to be given that bullshit information." Louis says as Hazel starts walking to the cat so I follow her.

She bends down and pets Tee. "Where the fuck are we sleeping?" Niall asks.

"Outside you fucker." Louis replies. All the bickering that I've had in the past months has went from one hundered to zero to one hundred again very quickly.

"There's a sofa in the conservatory and two in the living room." Hazel shouts, Niall already moving to the living room.

Louis moves to the conservatory, I know he prefers his own space so it makes sense."You better not have shagged on any of these."

We walk over to Louis. "Only the counter." I smirk and Hazel's face drops and I burst out laughing.

Louis' face looked rather traumatised as Hazel begins to drag me away. "He was joking." Hazel awkwardly smiles.

She walk up stairs, dragging me with her.

We end up laying there in a comfortable silence but I feel good. I feel as if I should get something off my chest. We're almost married, it's the least I could do.

"Late night talking with Harry and Hazel? Is that what you called it?" I ask, already shitting myself.

"What do you mean? She asks genuinely and I sit up.

"Back at Niall's" I explain and she nods.

"Yes."

"Well," I begin. "My dad and mum are on opposite sides of the Mafia. My mum is on the model side and my dad is on yours. That's one of the many reasons they'd argue." I say, opening up slowly.

It's not hard for me to open up to her, it's just hard to let my self open up in general. I've not opened up before really.

"Okay." She says and I stand up and start pacing, trying to walk off the panic. "Is everything kay?" She asks and I nod.

"Yes, Yes. Just tryna' word it, is all." I make excuses. There's no right way to word this.

"Before I ever knew I loved you, I'd sleep around a lot, you know that?" I try and make a starting point. She nods so I continue. "You promise to not baby me or some shit?" I ask her.

"Promise, Harry. What's up?"

"Well the reason I sleep around was because it was a time waster thing. I mean sex is great. You get the high but hen it always fades. Other than you, that I never seems to fade. But anyways, after the fade, all I can think about is how I had no desire to care for the other person and I assumed they didn't either. I think about how much mum thinks I'm a mess. The... The first time she found out, she cut my wrist."

"I'm sorry, Harry." She says, concern writren all over her face.

"It's okay. It's... the scar faded. And everytime I had sex after that., I truly thought it was the worst thing. Each time I had sex, I did the same punishment she did to me. She thought I was cock up, I'm a cock up."

She doesn't say anything but she nods, so I know I heard. "That night she found out, she called me a psychopath. Told me she wanted to kill me."

It always replays in my head. It started to stop after I had sex with her. I have sex with Hazel because I care for her.

"But I couldn't fucking stop. It's like an addiction, y'know? Every other night I'd go to a club then afterwards I'd be burden, my feelings will be ten times worse than before."

"I'm sorry, Angel. Did... did you ever hurt yourself when you had sex with me?" She asks and I realise how upset she must be.

The person she loves, doesn't even love himself enough.

"No, but you know the time I told you I relapsed? It was because I still wanted to feel that few mintues of love but I couldn't because when I got the girl, all I could think of was you. And that time we broke into the hotel room, that bandage, was me."

She breaks eye contact for only a second but make sures that I feel heard. I love her with all of me, I really do.

I sit back down and the first thing she does is hold my cheeks and gives me a hug. I never really do hugs but I love her hugs. I can smell her lovely scent. It's the most homely feeling.

She backs out the hug and gives me a small kiss, one that I'll never get enough of. "Thank you for telling me, Harry." She smiles, caressing my cheek.

"I wanted to tell you because you're the only person I want to love. I want to give you all of me." I say. She cracks a smile and hugs me again.

"If you ever do it again, please tell me. You deserve to have someone to talk about it with." I nod and she plants another rkiss. "Can I ask what side it is, angel?" She asks and I nod.

"The side you never get to hold." I lift up my left arm and she nods at it. Although she can't see it, now she knows.

She hold my arm up and kisses it three time.

"I love you." She whispers.