R + E •Reddie•

Jokes

Eddies POV:
After I left Richie's place, I couldn't stop thinking about it, and I don't even know why. Did he really do that just so he could make a stupid ass joke to piss me off? Yet again, it's Richie we're talking about, so it would make sense.. what if it was me? Why do I care either way? Richie's the most annoying guy I know, and he's definitely not gay, I mean, people say he is, but he isn't. I would know.

Richies POV:
After Eddie left, I was glad that he believed me when I said it was his mom. I've always made jokes like those. I'm not good at being "serious," which is probably why a lot of people find me annoying, I don't mind, though. I think I'm hilarious! They all do say I joke way too much, though.. but I think they just don't know how to take a joke, or maybe I do go too far sometimes. Like I said, I have no idea how to take things seriously. I can almost never read the room. I'm not good at anything, so to not be a TOTAL loser, I gotta be good at being funny! Which I'm not very good at according to everyone besides..well myself. Eddie especially hates my jokes. I'm pretty sure he hates every time I open my mouth. We've known each other for so long, though, so he probably gets annoyed. I would get annoyed if I was my friend too, to be honest.

Eddie's POV:
I walked through my front door to see my mommy sitting on her chair.

Sonia: "Eddie bear, What took ya so long? You know I get worried."

Eddie: "Sorry mommy I went to Richies for a bit."

Sonia: "I don't think that boy is a good influence on you. I've heard things about him hun."

Eddie: "He's my friend."

Sonia: "Make sure it stays that way. You know how many diseases you can get just from a kiss, but from another boy? Especially that boy. It's gross. The only person you kiss is your mommy Eddie bear."

Eddie: "I know."

Sonia: "good hunny. Now give mommy a kiss"

I walked over to her and kissed her on the cheek, then went to my room upstairs. My mom has always cared about my health and told me to be careful. You never know what disgusting disease you can get from..well, anything. Just seeing people touch each other grosses me out. Anyway, she was talking about how people have been saying stuff about Richie.. I think people are spreading rumors about him being gay for the 20th time.. Richie's not gay though. He would have told me, I know he would. Everyone thinks he's gay. My mom thinks it too, so she won't let me hang out with him as much.. she thinks he'll turn me gay. I've never really thought about it, though..ya know Richie being gay.. or me and Richie? What does kissing a guy even feel like? It probably feels weird as fucking hell. I don't even know what kissing a girl feels like..I mean what would it feel like to kiss Ri-

"HES GONNA FUCKING KILL ME EDDS!"

Richie fell through my window yelling loud as hell like he fucked up bad. Is he fucking crazy though if my mom heard him she'll kill me!

Eddie: "RICHIE WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!?"

I was pissed for 2 reasons. 1 he just broke my fucking window!!! 2 he's screaming at the top of his fucking lungs and sounds like a girl!! I'm so pissed right now, I added a 3rd reason just to be pissed at him and that reason is that HE'S A FUCKING DUMBASS!

Richie: "B-BOWERS A-AND TH-THE ARCADE AND THEN I SAID A-AND THEN HE SAID AND THEN R-RAN AND AND"

Eddie: "CHILL THE FUCK OUT! God.. youre stuttering like bill!"

Richie then said, gasping for air: "okay okay okay so.."