The List

Chapter 8: Levi

Chapter 8:

Surprise. Some people are afraid of surprises. Some people live for surprises. To each their own.

Surprises weren't ever a problem for me because no one has ever tried. I've known all of my Christmas and birthday presents far before I had received them. My mother has always been to excited about a party for it to ever be a surprise. Veronica was as plain and straightforward as it could get. If I was going to get a blow job she would talk about it nonstop until it was happening. Surprises are nonexistent in my life.

The bathroom filled with steam as I finished turning the faucet off and climbing out of the shower. A knock sounded from the door.

"Bug!", My mother sung from the other side of the door.

"Yeah?"

"I'm coming in," She fussed with the locked handle.

"I'm naked!" I shouted back grappling with the towel.

"I've seen it all before," She giggled away to herself, "Fine fine. Just listen I laid out an outfit on your bed," She tapped along on the door.

"Thanks," I muttered drying off and her heeled feet wandered off. My mother meant well. She always wanted to make me happy, but this buzz of romance adrenaline running through her veins was getting crazy. I was just going to drive to the florist. I was going to walk in and pass her the journal. I was going to leave with nothing in return. But my mother is putting more work into this than a Nicholas Sparks novel.

The blue towel around my waist nearly fell as I exited the bathroom. My room was just down the hall from the bathroom. I stomped into my room looking quickly at the dumb shirt, pants, and... tie my mother had lied out for me. The shirt was a green button up and the pants were just pants. Nothing really special. They weren't fancy or anything. Just black pants. The tie was just black and skinny. I remember wearing it to Kenny Jaharowitz's bar mitzvah. I forcefully shoved each body pant into the outfit with sheer accuracy.

"BUG!" I heard my mother roar from down the hall.

"Yes?" I answered as I ran one hand through my plain hair. It required absolutely no work. I pulled my shoes on quickly and headed towards my mothers voice.

"The limo will be here in 5 minutes," She fussed away with her iPad as we waited in the entryway.

"POTATO?" She called for Paige.

"Standing right here," Paige's face contorted away from the sound.

"Give Bug the roses," She pointed towards Paige and directed the crimson flowers towards me.

Paige padded towards me thrusting the thorny flowers into my palm. My lip pulled between my teeth as I overthought everything.

"Don't fuck it-," Paige began only to be cut off by my mom.

"Language, young lady!" She shooed Paige swiftly.

"Whatever," Paige breathed with a slick roll of the eye.

"Pick your battles," My mother muttered away to herself before turning back to me, "Bugaboo, remember when you pull near the flower shop you must stand up through the sunroof..."

"Sunroof?" I asked.

"Oh right! We got you a limo," Her face stretched to accommodate for her trust-me-I'm-better-than-you smile.

"A limo?"

"You are about to Pretty Woman this little duckling."

"Mom?"