Not Us, Not Ever

13. The Last School Day.

        I woke up super early so that everyone could get dressed and ready on time without me being in the way and since Riley and I are still technically guests I made him wake up, too. While he was taking his shower in the guest room bathroom, I set out my clothes and went back to bed in some basketball shorts and jersey — something I can sleep in and slip in and out of easily when I have to get changed for school. Riley had shorts, too, when he came back, but he was wearing a TV Show T-shirt called "Bob's Burgers." I asked him if he was going to wear that to school since he didn't set out any other clothes and he said yes since there's no point in impressing or getting tidy for anyone. He had a point, but he sounded so sad while saying it. I bet he misses how our friends were. I don't. I say if they're going to be dicks and not accept us for who we are, homosexuals, then forget it. They're not worth worrying over. I wish Riley would think the same.

        "I had a nightmare," he said quietly.

        It was random so I had to make sure I heard him right, 'What?"

        "Earlier. When I was crying in my sleep. I was having a bad dream. Thanks for waking me."

        "Do you want to tell me what happened?" His back was facing towards me, so I propped my head up on my hand that was supported by my elbow with one arm and wrapped my arm around his waist, placing my hand atop his and entwining our fingers.

        "It wasn't really much.. I was just scared. I know you do a lot to protect me and I know you're only going to school today to serve as a distraction for the twins. In my dream, you died. You weren't grazed by a bullet in the arm. You were shot dead in the heart by your dad even though you begged and begged for him to put the gun down.. in front of me. I started to run and I ended up it's Lily's front yard. She was hanging out with Jacob when I got there. I asked them to hide me from your dad since he was after me and they just stared at me with blank faces. Your dad was coming. I saw him across the street. He was yelling at me, 'You made me kill my little boy! He wasn't an queer like you!' and other stuff like that. Then I turned around and found myself tied to a wooden stage type of thing with a pile of wood under me. Hunter walked up to me with a match box as if he was ready to set me on fire. Then the others appeared around me in a circle; Hunter, Jacob, Evan, my dad, your dad, your mom, Lily, coach, the rest of the team, our teachers, etc., etc. Then they all said one thing... 'Burn in hell fire'. It only scared me more because of how vivid everything was and that we were back here," I didn't  have words, so I just kissed his shoulder. "Besides you, three other people knew I was gay."

        I raised an eyebrow, "Who?" Who knew he was gay and didn't sell it out to the whole neighborhood?

        "My first and last girlfriend. She thought I found another girl when I broke up with her. I was crying my eyes out when I had to explain to her I just wasn't interested in girls," he chuckled, "She said it was okay and she wouldn't tell anyone, but after a couple months she moved away. Alexandria was an awesome best friend in those 2 months. Then there was another friend. A guy. He was there when my mom found out. We were playing catch with a football in the backyard when my mom came downstairs with my laptop.. the pornography in my search history was what she was mad about and it was obvious that a straight man wouldn't watch something like what she found. I thought she'd yell at me less if he was in the room so I convinced her to let him stay, but I was soooo wrong. She told me that night before bed she wouldn't tell my bible-thumping father and that she'd support me no matter what.. then she died and my guy friend got mad at me for a silly reason and we didn't speak again. I haven't heard  from or seen him since he transferred schools. It's like something bad happens when someone knows, but you're still here.. But you were shot so I guess that was your bad thing and yet you still choose to stick around me.. Dumbass," he laughed at me. His mother passed away a couple years ago. Car crash. Died on impact.