LOVE YOU TO DEATH | TAEKOOK

44. Shudder to Think

TMZ: T-48 hours until the Academy Awards and no one has seen nor heard from Kim Taehyung in days. His "friend" JJK was seen storming onto the studio lot where Taehyung is based, scaring production assistants and barking orders before leaving less than an hour later, but not a peep from the actor himself.

♾♾♾

"Morning," Jungkook chirped, much to Taehyung's surprise. It was early, and a bit of a surprise for the younger to be knocking on his door unannounced after their argument, or whatever it was, the night before.

Taehyung rubbed his eyes and nodded, saying nothing. He turned and walked back into the house, leaving the door open wide.

Jungkook got the message and followed, "Want to go out for breakfast?"

He wore a serene smile, his whole demeanor gentle and warm as he watched the older groggily blink back at him.

Taehyung nodded again and mumbled nonsensical sounds of agreement, shuffling back into his bedroom to get dressed. He unbuttoned his pajama top and shrugged it off, letting it fall to the floor when he felt a pair of hands snake their way around his waist.

"I'm sorry," Jungkook murmured, pressing his face into the older's shoulder. 

Taehyung wilted, guilt poking at the inside of his rib cage.

"Don't be," he muttered, the protest weak in his throat.

Jungkook leaned slightly forward to kiss his cheek, "I can be sorry. You're not the boss of me," he chuckled, squeezing the older's waist.

Taehyung stepped out of his arms and finished getting dressed. It felt like he was drowning in midair, his own culpability scorching within.

He left himself be led out of the house for breakfast where they ate in near silence, neither of them willing to ask the hard questions or say the wrong things.

♾♾♾

The next day, Jungkook tried again. This time, he didn't bother to knock and just tiptoed through the older's door with a notebook and a muffin.

It was early, the sun barely peeking out through the tops of the palm trees lining the streets. Early enough that even the smog hadn't settled in yet.

Taehyung was still asleep, which Jungkook expected. He crawled into bed and waited, back up against the headboard with one hand on the older's back.

It was hard not to completely suffocate Taehyung; the impulse to get as close as possible was difficult to resist for the many minutes that followed.

"Jungkookie?"

Taehyung was groggy and only half-awake, feeling mildly disconcerted about these unexpected arrivals, though they weren't quite unwelcome.

Jungkook hummed, "Morning, honey," he nodded, mouth easing into a gentle smile, "Sleep okay?"

Taehyung nodded, eyes still heavy. Everything felt heavy in one way or another.

"I guess so," he mumbled, not sure why he was lying, "Are you okay?"

Jungkook issued a tight-lipped smile and a tiny nod, "Of course I'm okay," he asserted, swallowing his trepidation as he let his eyes slip down the older's body.

"I have something for you," he announced. He reached over to the bedside table for the notebook and handed it to Taehyung, "Feelings. Many of them," he clarified, eyes warm and docile.

Taehyung took the notebook, a tiny crease in his brow, "Thank you," he whispered, voice evaporating amidst his confusion.

Jungkook shimmied down in the bed to lie next to Taehyung, pulling him close, "This is weird," he mumbled, voice quiet in the older's back.