she whispered to me "start counting your calories."
so i'd count and i'd count. and id eat less and less.
i loved the way it made me feel.
i googled "side affects of starving yourself?"
euphoria.
i ignored the hair loss, declining mental health, death.
it's like a drug, she whispered.
and god, i was so addicted.
always cold,
but the kilos dropped.
always tired,
but i was getting skinny.
always dizzy,
but he would like me soon.
looking at the scale number dropping made me proud.
all i can say is ana, she's my bestfriend.
