Damn... This is the 48th chick I tried to unlock... I really thought I had it this time too... As I awkwardly walk away from Tracy's house with her looking angrily out the window, I start thinking about what Charlie said to me in math class, what if my soul mate is a dude? I text Herb about it because he's a pretty close friend of mine and he understands me.
"Yo Herb, I need mental advice" I text. Herb responds immediately.
"Okay, on what man?" Herb texts.
"Do you think my soulmate isn't a girl, but a guy?" I text back.
"Hmm... Idk man. Come over to my place and we'll talk about it." Herb responds. I shrug and jump on my stylish green bike, and zoom down the sidewalk. I pull up to Herb's trailer house, and open the door. Herb is on the couch, and not stoned miraculously. He seemed to have showered and groomed himself. When I walked in the door, he sat up.
"H-hey man" Herb said nervously.
"Hey Herb. What's up?" I ask
"Um, just thinking about what you said. Like, what if my soulmates a dude?" Herb asked. I shrugged.
"That's why I'm here. I think we need to..." I trail off.
"We need to what?" Herb asked curiously.
"I think we need to practice just in case it is a dude. 'Cause ya know, we've made out with chicks before. But never a dude..." I said fidgeting with my hands.
"Are you suggesting we practice on each other?" Herb asked.
"Well yeah... You know... To get prepared..." I say blushing profusely.
"Yeah of course." Herb said, standing to walk over to me seductively. He brushes his hand across my face and whispered three beautiful and incredibly sexy words into my ear:
"But no homo."
YOU ARE READING
69th Time's the Charm
HumorThis story was an idea that came to me when I thought: "What if people had keys and locks instead of their regular genitals, and the lock would only be unlocked if it was your soulmate?" Yeah, you may be thinking, WTF is wrong with you, are you okay...
