A Crown of Clouds

Chapter 20

I'd started to understand why people say that liars begin to believe their own lies, convincing Cole that I was the same person he'd left four days ago had proven to be harder than I thought. The more I said it, the more believable even I sounded to myself. "I'm fine really, I'm just tired and exhausted and my hand is healing from my fall in the library," I tacked on the cheesiest grin at the end of my sentence for good effect. Cretan had explained that in order to pass on a feeling accurately, you must feel it in honest force, no lies, and with your entire body. The same goes for picking one up, it must be a clear thought, thought out completely, or it will come across as a blurry image and not picked up at all. Cretan said there were Komana's of old who could explore your mind and all the memories stored at a single touch. Komana's apparently aren't what they used to be, Cretan would say. It became more of a trophy status to attain, rather than a skill to upkeep, learn and maintain. More of a prized title than a task of protecting Queen and country.

"I can't put my finger on it, there's just something different..." Cole was curious, and I was plastering bandaid after bandaid on his curiosity. "Well, I started reading this damn book that seemed to keep throbbing like a sore thumb on the bookshelf each time I walked by..." it was true, I'd started reading at night, it was all I could do to calm my overthinking, anxious mind. "Oh you have now?" Cole looked intrigued, "which book?"

"The fallen poppies."

"Of course you'd read that book."

I crumpled my forehead and mouth at his remark. I'd fallen asleep reading each night after being so exhausted from training, although I had to admit, I'd started to look forward to the nights to read. "And where are you up to?"

"Well... Anthony has come home from the war... he burst through the doors to embrace his wife, only she was at the table with another man and a baby." Cole's face was full of exaggerated expressions, "Ooo, juicy! The poor guy right... really it was the newspaper's fault for reporting him dead instead of Andrew, I'd be suing if it were me!" I did really feel for the man in the story, he'd been so in love with his new wife when war broke out, "three years is a bloody long time to wait for someone though, even if she knew he was alive."

"And what would you do? what if you were married and your lover had gone to war, he was reported dead and another handsome man came along... could you blame her?" Something in the way he spoke those words out of that grin made my stomach flip upside down. "If it were me...", I said as I inched closer to where he sat at the end of the table, books strewn about everywhere... "I wouldn't let him go to war, and if he really had to go... I'd find a way to go with him, and, If it were my husband, there is no way in hell I would let him die."

I was a hand's distance from his face, his eyes searching my own... his smile had faded, replaced by something else... I heard it then, actually heard his heart thumping, the steady beat rapidly increasing with each step I took closer.

"Not that I'd be any help in a war to even defend myself, or that war would even break out," I laughed, breaking the silence, I had to make Cole remember the Hal he'd left behind, not the one who spoke with this kind of boldness that toyed with such men and ideas like Cole and war. Our faces still inches apart, I could taste the smell of him. His mouth held a grin I so badly wanted to lay my own grin upon. "I sure hope not, that axis can stay severed for a thousand years!"  I wondered how much Cole knew about families being torn apart... of memories wiped and magic lost. I couldn't fathom; if he knew... how he could not want to find a way to restore what was lost and broken.... and if not for them, for his sister. I'd try a smarter tactic, "What's so good in Tarata that the other realms don't have anyways?" Cole's smile was pure delight, "You're looking at it..." I punched him the minute the words left his mouth.