Astonishing Us

XLVII

RIDGE

"Ahhhh!" Aether screamed in pain that made me look at her immediately. I snatched the picture off the wall and hurriedly left the room with her inside my arms.

My heart squeezed in pain when I saw her reaction as she held her tummy like it was, what was hurting at the moment that made my heart beat to increase in both panic and pain. Her eyebrows lowered while she was squeezing her eyes shut and wrinkling her nose. Her facial expressions are telling me that her tummy is so painful.

I cannot run, I'm afraid I might trip over and fall while she is in my arms. I walked fast though as fast as how my heart beats at the moment, I feel my eyes tearing up as I listen to her soft painful grunts. She's hurting and all I can do is to carry her out of this place. I swallowed hard and focused my cloudy eyes on my way, I try my hardest to hold my tears I do not want to break down I wanna act strong, I wanna be strong for her at the moment she feels weak, tried and hurting but my tears just fell, just roll down my cheeks when I felt a warm liquid from her inner thighs as I saw her eyes dropped closed.

Blood. Blood is flowing down from her vagina.

Our baby... Our baby...

HERMES

"I've called out some of our personal men to clear out the island. The whole incident is now under investigation. I have also contacted the asylum that took care of Ceasar in Italy. We will send Fuller there once his medical care for his injuries is done here don't worry, he is guarded by dozens of policemen and some of our family's personal men," I reported to Ridge who looked like a mess at the moment.

I wanna compare him to me when I lost Jane but other than the pain of losing a kid our emotions and what we felt to be like a mess is completely far different.

"Send him to jail," he said that taken me back.

My eyes widened as I stared at my cousin.

"He's mentally ill, Ridge what he needs is medication and after that we can send him to jail— "

"I don't care what he needs! Putangina mukha bang may pake pa ako!?" His expression hardened as he looked up at me with his eyes narrow, glaring at me, "just fucking send him to jail! I don't care if he dies there with his injury! Just fucking send him in! Or he will die in my hands!"

I blows out a harsh deep breath to calm myself down I stared back at his narrowed eyes, "you need to calm down cousin if you let your anger take over you, you will become as monster as him, just think of it for a second and- "

"Tangina ano!? Anong hindi mo maintindihan Hermes!? I lost my kid! My kid, Hermes! He killed my unborn child and you want me to calm down?! You want me to think twice!? Palibhasa hindi mo maintindihan kasi wala ka sa tabi ni Jane nung nawala din anak niyo!!" He shouted at me as he stood up and pointed a finger at me.

"Not all Hermes! Hindi lahat kayang intindihin yung sinasabi mong there's no villains just different point of views! Kasi kahit putang ina bali-baliktarin pa ang mundo he is a fucking heartless psychotic villain! Hindi lahat kayang magpatawad ng kasing bilis niyo ni Jane! Yes! Putangina yes! He's been through hell too! He suffered a lot too! And maybe you're right he has a story to tell! Pero putang ina hindi yon sapat na dahilan para paranasin niya din kami ng ganon! His painful past doesn't justify his actions! He doesn't have the right to make us taste the hell he has been tasting all of his life!" He pushed me away and I just moved as my eyes followed him as he walked towards the exit of the hospital.

I looked at Jane when I felt her warm hug behind me, seeing the tears in her eyes. I know that Ridge's words affected her. I should be mad at him for resurfacing the pain I tried to bury deep for Jane to remember but I know somehow his words were right. Ridge was right, but in our case, we chose to forget and forgive because we had been hurting for so long. I kissed my wife's forehead and hugged her.

"Shhh... Baby..."

RIDGE

"We grew up together. Dad- I mean Marcus brought him to my room after my six birthdays when he was three. He was indifferent, cold for a kiddo. I didn't know he was Marcus' biological kid, what I know is he is just a random kid Marcus adopted out of pity. When he started talking to me, I felt something I shouldn't feel at my age and I shouldn't feel towards someone with the same gender as me. He was the only one I have; Marcus is always out of town and we are always left alone with the maids. I was homeschooled and he was sent out of the island to study normally when I was 15. I longed for him. He didn't go home, not even for Christmas or for his birthday, three years after he went back." Rogue paused to take a deep breath.

"He is more difficult to understand when he comes back, there are times when I feel like I'm with somebody else. The way he looked at me, he talked and touched me it's so different until I caught him talking to himself. He was raped at the age of 14 and it planted a harsh trauma within him but as time goes by that trauma turned into something else, I already knew something was wrong with him and it only got worse when he got raped, he becomes sex addicted at the very young age and his trauma build another personality. I told Marcus about it and he told me ever since Jaime turned two, he was already diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder and told me that was the reason why Jaime's own mother doesn't want him. I took bs psychology wanting to find a cure for him but it is hard for me to study at the same time plan how to destroy you, I forgot about him for two years until. Until he went back home again, with another personality again. A personality who sees me as a lover, as a partner as his only ally. He told me how a girl broke his other personality's heart and ego and when he told me whose girl broke his one personality's heart it became much easier for me to plan how to destroy you, kuya." His hands intertwined over his shaking knees.

"Turns out that he forced himself to have that personality to manipulate me easily. He played me like a piece of his game, even that night kuya. That night of your anniversary's celebration is planned, he found out you reserved a slot at that resort that's why he suggested that resort to their Adviser as a graduation gift for them. His plan is to take away Aether, to manipulate her into coming back to him but things didn't go as he planned that he needed to use me as soon as he could. I did what he wants because he told me its for his other personality, funny maybe I'm also not right in the head na okay lang sa akin na dalawa kami ni Aether basta manatili iyong katauhan niyang kailangan at mahal ako. I did what he planned and used Snow just like how she thought she was playing the game Jaime started. Kuya. Kuya I know I don't have rights to beg or demand but please just this one let him get medication pag magaling na siya ako mismo magsusuko sa kaniya sa presinto. Please kuya, he is ill, he is not right in the head."

"Ridge, don't do things you will regret sooner. Lawakan mo isip mo, he might be the villain of your story but it could be you who is the villain in his story too he suffered a lot cousin that's why he is like that maybe you can— "

My mouth set in a hard line as my emerald eyes narrowed at the road, I stepped on the gas, as I drove without direction.

Why? Why do they want me to adjust for someone who did nothing but to hurt us? He killed my child, Aether's and mine. He killed our unborn child. Why should I forgive!?

My hands on the steering wheel tightened as I wasn't aware I'm already crying as I drove without direction.

I'm driving full of mixed emotions inside my chest when I heard Aether's voice randomly inside my head.

"Go back, baby. I need you..."

I maneuvered with tears falling down my cheeks. I gulped until my silent cries turned into loud sobs. I cried hard, as I drove back to the hospital.

I can't. I can't forgive him. I can't forgive aniyone who is involved in making or living hellish. Not even Rogue.

Even if it turns me into an unforgiving monster, so be it. I won't.

____

THENAUGHTYGRAY