Last week on Shameless, this is what we were doing: Your house is Frank's wet dream. Never gonna get him out. EDDIE: Turns out I can't afford to live somewhere else and support you two. Why can't you stay with Uncle Ray? When I get back, I want the new stock shelved with all the labels facing the same direction. We're gonna have a whole night together to celebrate. This is your house... where you live with Linda and the kids. I'm gay, dude, not q*eer. Five hundred and eight-seven dollars. I'm taking the PSAT's for some Polish kid over in Ridgedale? I told Richie that your rates went up. So he's giving you $150. See you in three hours. Be out in two. I am going to a wedding today. I am really gonna do it this time. You're coming, Mom? I'll just get you a piece of cake, Mom. That would just be... ♪ Think of all the luck you got ♪ ♪ Know that it's not for naught ♪ ♪ You were beaming once before ♪ ♪ But it's not like that anymore ♪ ♪ What is this downside ♪ ♪ That you speak of? ♪ ♪ What is this feeling you're so sure of? ♪ ♪ Round up the friends you got ♪ ♪ Know that they're not for naught ♪ ♪ You were willing once before ♪ ♪ But it's not like that anymore ♪ ♪ What is this downside ♪ ♪ That you speak of? ♪ ♪ What is this feeling ♪ ♪ You're so... sure of? ♪ (faucet running, radio broadcast plays quietly) (quietly): Mm. (quietly): Mm. Mm. Brush your teeth; I want to play. Smoothie. Thanks. Hello, Liam. How you doin', huh? (Debbie sighs) Didn't Fiona tell you to stop electrocuting dolls? They have to pay for their sins. (passionate breathing) You almost there? What? I got to make lunches. Oh, tell me more. Well, first I cut off the crusts... Uh-huh. - ...and then I put the apple slices in a baggie... Oh, don't stop. (whispers): You look amazing. Hurry up. I don't want to go before you. I already had a couple. You didn't make a sound. Big family; thin walls. When you consider how humans evolved, they were probably used to mating in public. But one day a pioneer that really wanted to get freaky...Steve... What? What? Steve, I'm late. Focus. (both panting) Damn it! Carl! CARL: It's not me! Hector's at the pole again! Hector! Hey, Hector... is there any way that you could... I can't this time, Fiona. It's the third red notice this year. I'm sorry. Not the first time we got shut off; won't be the last. Is there any way that you can scrape the money together today? We have it. She just forgot to pay it. I took an extra shift yesterday, and I just spaced it.
Call my cell phone when you pay it, I'll swing back at the end of the day. Thanks, Hector. (sighs) "Arts and Leisure"? So I can read about pagan-worshipping actors complaining about how America sucks? I'll stick to my steroid-riddled athletes, thank you. So... what's the verdict? The banana and blueberry are spectacular. Oh! KAREN: So good, Mom. Really? So, tonight we are going to go off the b*at path. We are going to have... Hungarian night. All right? We're gonna have hurka FRANK: Mm! and toltott tojas and rakott krumpli! Guaranteed to exit your colon at the speed of sound. Huh! Mom... it's Parents Night at school tonight. Right. Right. I will be there, sweetie. I've been working towards that. That's right, I have it right on my calendar. I circled it. I've just been, I've just been busy, busy, but I will be there. Dad, will you join us at Parents Night tonight? Me? Not you, f*ck. I was talking to Daddy Frank. Daddy Frank, will you come? Oh... no, no, ladies... I don't do school. We all have our phobias, and school is mine. All of it. Textbooks full of falsehoods, teachers' unions full of thugs, and tenured imbeciles who still use words like "irregardless." Not for me. However, the crepes... merci. Uh, regarding dinner, why not just move it up, do the Hungarian thing at 5:00? What do you say? Well, think it over. Whatever. I'll be back before 5:00. I got a meeting. SHEILA: Karen? Sweetie? I'm gonna be there, okay? I have a session today. I'm gonna have a breakthrough, I can see it. (scoffing, snickering): Yeah, come on... KAREN: Keep laughing, and I will slit your throat while you sleep. (knocking on door) I'm coming. Warren. Debbie. Lip upstairs? Yeah. FIONA: Carl, eat. Don't organize, okay? After you eat them, they all end up in the same place. Who was at the door?
DEBBIE: Warren for Lip. Don't worry about the ketchup and stuff. Just the milk and the meat. STEVE: All right, enough hot water for at last one more shower. Did Carl blow up the neighborhood again? No, I forgot to pay the bill. Hey... (pats her behind) happens to the best of us. Not to me, okay? I-I'm not like this. Like what? Distracted. Yeah, by what? Well, you're the only new thing in the mix. Wait, am I actually distracting Fiona Gallagher? Really! I... hey... I will make a coffee run after I finish. Fine. Okay? Time for school, okay? Lip! Feet on the floor! Lip? (sighs) Warren. Where's my paper? Where's my money? I got it. Okay. I want to see it. $35, right? No, $50. Ching chow choon chow cho ching wang hang fo.... Stop speaking fake Korean, Warren. I never said $35. Not for the paper I wrote you last month, not for the paper I wrote you last semester, not for this one. All right? It's $50. Can you do $36? No. $38? (groans): Oh... Warren... once again proving that Koreans are the Asian Jews. That's r*cist. No. Facts cannot be r*cist. Many Irish are drunks. Many French smell. Most Chinese hate children. That's why they sell them to Americans. Now, the fact here is that you, the one Korean I know, made a deal of 50 bucks for an original essay about The Great g*dd*mn Gatsby, yet... once again, you're trying to get me to lower my agreed-upon price.
