Astraea

Prologue

I will let you into the recesses of my mind for a moment... this was the poem that started it all... If I had known the chaos that would ensue I wonder if I would have even bothered to lay my thoughts on paper... the respite I felt once the words were out ...did it do anything to salve my wounded soul...

I fell on a razor blade and it kissed my skin
I wasn't mad at it ... It just bruised me a bit
And I was able to breathe
The darkness and numbness eased a bit
Emotional pain
hurts ...
It doesn't make sense ...
It's a hurt that seems to have no reprieve

I fell on a razor blade and it caressed my arm
It made me more aware of the aching in my soul
The world made sense again
The ebb and flow of the continuing pain ...
Paused
My perspective changed
It was like a reset button had been pushed

I fell on a razor blade once
And it didn't do anything for me
So I fell again
And again
And again
And again
And again ...
Then the pain eased

It scares me that falling once didn't save me that time

It haunts me that one day the razor blade will find my pulse and caress it with it's sharp edge
And then I will finally reach...
The
End
Of
My fall..