TF2 x Reader [Oneshots]

Medic x Insane!Reader [Fluff]

This chapter was requested by the beloved Pyrosnowflake461. I miss you buddy, come back to Wattpad!

Wiping the blood from your face you take a deep sigh and shove your gun back into it's holster. Your team has successfully won this battle and are free to do as they please for the rest of the day.

Most of your team members would use this time to clean their weapons, themselves, make food or go to sleep. You plan on doing those things too, but after you've collected your goodies.

You've killed many men today. As a reward you began to collect some of the many teeth and bones from the mutilated corpses scattered about 2fort. You never knew what miscellaneous goodies you'd find while scanning dead bodies, and that was the fun of it.

Most of your team would call you crazy or psychotic... sometimes even insane. Hearing these words as often as you do only fueled your insanity and bloodlust. On the battlefield you'd silently stalk out your prey. Quietly waiting until they are alone or reloading, then swiftly striking.

There's another member on this team that finds just about the same amount of joy and interest in the things that you wrangle up, and that member is the teams beloved Medic.

After collecting your goodies you place them inside your backpack.. It's not exactly your backpack since you've stolen it off a deceased Sniper, but fuck that. Finders keepers bush-bitch!

With a content smile plastered onto your face, you begin your path to the med-bay. It's not too long of a walk and the scenery is beautiful enough to make an old man cry. Bodies, limbs, guts and intestines are scattered throughout your path. Such lovely scenery.

As you arrive to your destination you swing your backpack over and off of your shoulder, carrying it with your hand and tossing it into the med-bay. Medic turns to greet you with a happy smile plastered onto his face. 

"Ah! Hello Y/N, I've been expecting you!" Medic greets, walking up to the bag you've just tossed onto the floor. He picks it up and walks over to his examining table, dumping the contents out and onto the table.

You walk up to Medic and plop down onto the table, glancing over at all you've collected. "I was thinking that some of these can go into jars with formalin. It'll be something along the lines of a wet specimen." You mutter, turning your head slightly to view Medic.

He nods cheerfully. "Yes! And some of these teeth and smaller bones can be put in jars! Or maybe even decor?" Medic cheers. You smile, picking up a few teeth from the pile. "Or maybe we can hide these around the base?"

A mischievous grin creeps onto Medics face. "Du verrücktes Mädchen... I'm in!" Medic raves, turning his attention to you. "Yay! Shove as much stuff you can manage to fit into your pockets, we can't bring the backpack because it'll be too obvious.. hehehe.." 

The two of you began to stuff your pockets with teeth and bones, leaving the tattered and mutilated innards and guts spread across of the table to be jarred at a later time.

"I feel like we should start out in the kitchen, that's where majority of the other teammates will be!" You said, turning your attention back to Medic.

He cracks a smile, turning his head to face you. "Great minds think alike, no?" He chuckled, pushing his glasses up onto his face.

"You know it baby!" You cheered whilst making your way to the exit. Medic blushed, then began to follow. "Awe schatz, am I truly your baby?" He joked, playfully jabbing your shoulder with his weirdly sharp elbow.

You blushed, looking downwards to hide your pink painted face. "I meaaaaaaan you could be... But I think I should be your baby rather than you be mine." You muttered, walking a bit faster than before.

Medic walks faster, matching your pace. He reaches, placing a hand on your shoulder and spinning you around to face him. "Is that so?" He teased, placing his hand under you chin and lifting your head to face him.

You body begins to tense as you feel your blood rush up to your face. Medic is looking down at you with a small smile and a cocked brow. His ice blue eyes glaring down at your flushed, pretty face.

"Must I repeat myself, dumme Mädchen?" He asks, softly gripping your chin. His smile widens a bit, turning to a sharp grin. He lets go of your face and chuckles.

Your eyebrows furrow slightly as a look of embarrassment and confusion plaster your flushed face. Medic only laughs harder. "Make flirty comments, receive flirty gestures." He teased, walking away and to the kitchen. You follow suit, wishing he wasn't just teasing you.

The two of you arrive at the kitchen and are greeted with the pleasant smell of freshly cooked food. Plates of bacon, eggs, flapjacks and sausage fill the table as Pyro, Spy, Sniper and Demo sit around the table. Engineer is planted in front of the stove, working on biscuits and gravy.

"Oh bugger, here comes the troublemakers.." Sniper teases, turning his attention to you and Medic. Everyone else at the table stops what their doing and turns to the two of you.

"I hope the two of you didn't come here to make trouble." Spy spoke, rolling his eyes and pulling a cigarette from his holder.

"Oi spy, wanna hand me one?" Sniper asks, reaching his hand out. Spy scoffs, slapping his hand away and pulling a match from his holder to spark his cigarette.

"In your dreams, bushman." Spy snaps back, shutting his holder and placing it in his coats pocket. Sniper rolls his eyes and takes his hand back. You giggle, shoving your hands into your back pockets.

Medic turns to you, cocking a brow. He ticks his head to the right, motioning for you to step away. You do so and Medic follows suite.

Everyone at the table stares at the two of you, trying to understand what the hell you two are plotting.

"Mine Liebe, I'm not sure if we should shower them with with gifts, they're about to eat. And honestly I wouldn't mind grabbing a bite to eat as well." Medic says, placing a finger on his glasses and pushing them up his nose.

You sigh, nodding your head. "Yeah, I kinda thought that. But then my other thought was fuck it let's do it anyways."

Medic chuckles, patting your head. "As was I! But I decided otherwise when I saw the pancakes." Medic jokes, walking away from you and sitting at the table. You follow, taking a seat between Spy and Sniper.

"Oi Sheila." Sniper chirped, grabbing at the plate of bacon. He places some bacon on his plate, then turns to face you. He smiles, placing some bacon on your plate then turning to make contact with Spy.

The two of them stare at each other for a few seconds, then Snipes passes the plate across of the table to Pyro. "Sale pute.." Spy mutters. Sniper chuckles, turning to eat some bacon.

Engie plops down at the table, placing two separate plates of gravy and biscuits onto the table.

The seven of you sit around the table, eating and talking amongst one another. Later on you and Medic hid the bones and teeth under your fellow mercs pillows with a note saying "From the Tooth Fairy".

1268 Words, I hope you enjoyed! Have a nice day/night! :) -Lumi