Promise Flower

Haze

There's a ringing in my head. Actually it's pounding. And buzzing. I feel like there's so much pressure in my brain that my eyes are going to be forced out of the sockets. I open my eyes to find I'm laying in my bed and the sun is shining brightly through my window. It burns and I wish it wouldn't.

I don't remember much from last night, but I guess I at least managed to get myself to bed. I'm completely naked though except for my panties and I'm not even sure how that happened. Everything is such a blur. All I remember is coming home, drinking, and cursing the fact that I have a brother. Everything else is a fog that makes it hard for me to determine what's real and what's a dream.

First I need to do something about this hangover. I've never drank so much before and I regret it greatly. I manage to find the strength to sit up but I can't get to my feet. The room is spinning around me and I'm pretty sure I'm still drunk to some degree. This is the absolute worst.

"Fuck," I mumble to myself. I throw my head back on the pillow and try to plead with the powers that be to make the room stop dancing.

"You're awake?"

I look up and see Jimin standing in my doorway with nothing but his boxers on. Now I'm really struggling to figure out what happened last night.

"When did you get here?" I mumble.

"You don't remember?" He asks annoyed. "You left me a voicemail last night. By the time I got here you were already extremely fucked up."

"Oh," I say still trying to piece together the previous night as best I can. I don't remember calling him and leaving him a voicemail. I don't remember him being here at all. I thought I just got drunk and passed out.

"You really don't remember anything do you?" The tone in his voice lets me know that whatever happened he's not happy about it at all.

"No," I sigh. "I'm sorry, I was a fucking mess last night."

"Yeah, no shit." He rolls his eyes and steps out of the room. He returns a brief moment later with water and medicine and sets it on the nightstand next to me. "Here," he huffs turning to walk back out.

"Babe, wait," I plead. He turns back to me and sighs. "I can tell you're upset, so I'm sorry for whatever I may have done last night that has you mad at me."

"Ok," he says turning back around to leave.

"Jimin, please," I plead again. "Can you at least tell me what I did?"

"You mean besides being completely stupid and reckless?" He says sharply.

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry for fighting me when I tried to take the bottle from you? Sorry for spilling soju everywhere then proceeding to throw up all over both of us and the floor? Sorry for having me try to carry your ass to the bathtub so I can clean you and everything else up? Sorry for throwing up two more times in the bathtub and nearly choking? Sorry for going in and out of consciousness and scaring the ever living shit out of me because I thought you were fucking dying? Sorry for making it hard for me to get any sleep because I had to keep checking on you to make sure you were still breathing? You're sorry for all of that?"

His words feel venomous as they hit me in my chest. I don't remember any of that and I feel terrible that I put him through it. He sounds angry and exhausted, but also sad and hurt.

"Yes," I say softly. "I don't remember any of it, and I know that's my fault for being so fucking stupid and drinking way too much, but I'm sorry for all of it."

"I thought you were dying!" He shouts with tears welling in his eyes. "How the fuck could you be so stupid?! You know you don't handle your drinks well but you still thought it would be a good idea to drink half a fucking bottle of tequila and two bottles of soju?! And if I wasn't here what would you have done with the other four bottles? Would you have kept drinking them until you fucking died?!"