Promise Flower

Sweat

It's nearly 4 am when I make it back to my apartment. The drive was a bit of a challenge, but I could feel the weight on my shoulders getting lighter and lighter the further I got.

Jimin called me shortly after I left wanting to stay on the phone with me until I made it back safely. He kept me company for a short while until he was no longer able to stay awake. About half of my drive was spent listening to the sound of him lightly snoring through the phone. When I got home I whispered a soft goodnight to him and hung up.

Now I can finally rest.

Hours later I wake up around 10 am feeling well rested. I haven't had a restful sleep since the first night I was back home. Every night since then had been restless and stressful.

When I check my phone I have a number of messages from my parents. They tell me they're sorry about everything and they don't blame me for leaving. They understand and just want to make sure I made it back safe. I'm glad they aren't upset with me, but they know exactly how hard it is being around Ryan.

I also have a message from Jimin asking if I made it home safe. I assure him I did and tell him how his snores got me through the rest of my trip. He says he wishes he could come be with me, but his parents wanted him to stay at least until New Years. I would rather he spend the time with them anyway, we see each other all of the time and I don't want him cutting time with his family short because of me.

I take this time alone to simply relax. I had been so caught up in the shit at home that I never checked my grades for the semester.

Thankfully I passed with A's and B's and got an A- on my photo project. I know I could have done much better but I guess it's still good considering the fact that I had had to change the angle midway through. Not to mention I spent a large part of the semester hanging out with Jimin but not taking photos like I should have been. I'll take that A- as a definite win.

My time started off relieving, enjoying my own company and not having to worry about anything. Now after a few days I'm starting to go stir crazy. No one is in town so I have no one to hang out with. I talk to Jimin all the time and I had an hours long phone call with Tae telling him how my entire trip went. But I'm still starting to feel pretty bored.

I learn there's a photo exhibit showcasing various photographers going on the day before New Year's Eve. I decide at the last minute that I'd go just to give myself something to do.

It turns out to be a great idea. I feel good getting out and doing something, and even better when I begin mingling with the other people in attendance. I meet a range of people from photography enthusiasts, collectors, and other photographers. It turns out to be a great night of networking for me. I'm getting closer to graduating and these connections could help tremendously.

When I get home I talk to Jimin as I do every night and tell him about my day and he does the same. Each day ends with us talking ourselves to sleep then waking in the morning and texting about how we once again couldn't survive the night.

New Year's Eve is a bit different. I was hoping I'd be with him to ring in the new year but he won't be back until after that. His family has something planned so I don't hear from him quite as often throughout the day as I typically would.

As the day goes on I notice everything around me getting foggy more and more. I don't think much about it until I also notice myself feeling a bit weak. I can tell I'm getting sick and I can only hope it's just a cold. I take some medicine in hopes that it will pass, but after a few hours nothing seems to be getting better.

As a matter of fact I feel like I'm getting worse rather quickly. Unfortunately I know this feeling and I'm not to thrilled about it. After checking my temperature, my 102° fever confirms my suspicions that I likely have the flu. Happy New Year's Eve to me, I guess.