CELESTIAL FLOWERS ( s. gojo )

arc vi ━ chapter i. serenity

a r c vi.

❝ who are you?

are you tool, thief, or girl? ❞

━━ chapter i. serenity

KOYAMA KAZUKO IS A HORRIBLE GIRL. From the moment he laid his eyes on her, Gojo had surmised that she was going to be a pain in the ass. That uptight, scowling figure of a girl who barely reached his shoulders in height. Her twin-tailed braids, and bottom-up formal blouses that made her look like she was desperate to be validated as an adult.

She was the personification of everything he was trying to change. That blind loyalty towards authority figures, the inability to place values in her own life, and the suppression of dreams and freedom and wishes.

Ever since Suguru, and the events that transpired with his one and only best friend, Gojo had started on the path of realization. That even if he was the strongest. There were times when strength wasn't enough.

Because strength won't mend the aching parts of people left behind by those they loved, won't resurrect all the dead bodies piling up on the path of Jujutsu sorcerers. Strength won't— cannot change the godforsaken system of children laying their lives and fueling the endless challenge of protecting the world from curses.

Their world is of rotten forests and dead bodies. Sickness crawling up tree barks and branches, into lives and fruits and seeds that will grow more trees that will ultimately inherit the same sickness. Over and over again until more bodies pile from the poison, from the rot and the ruination.

I am a tool. That monotone voice that speaks as if she's reading dictionary definitions. More tool than girl. More machine than girl. More anything, but a girl who needs to live her damn life and not continuously risk it for the benefit of those above her. Another pawn in the endless game of Jujutsu sorcery, another cog to the wheel that keeps on turning and turning and producing dead bodies and hollow souls.

How he'd love to grab her by sickly shoulders and shake all the sickening loyalty out of her. You're not a tool, you're a person. How he'd love to tell everyone that and beat the rot out of them. You're people! You're not tools dedicated to duty. You're people.

But who would listen? Who would when the rot clings stubbornly to their flesh? Isn't that why Suguru left (him)? Because he'd seen all the rot and decided to stop being a pawn, a cog in the hopeless system of death and sacrifice and even more meaningless deaths and sacrifice.

Gojo had seen her. That horrible twerp of a girl staring at him with wide, pleading eyes. She's scared. And it didn't take a genius like him to find out what they'd done to her when he saw the crimson lines snaking across her bare skin. She's so scared. And yet she told him to leave her. For some godforsaken, inscrutable reason, she managed to ask him (the audacity, the absolute madness of it all!) to leave her alone. Because she's fine? She's okay?

What a horrible girl. Even a couple of meters away from death's doorway, the stubborn, straitlaced streak remained.

But it's not her fault. It isn't. Kazuko is just another tree in the forest, infected by rot, by the disgusting values those higher than her have taught. It's not your fault. It's not your responsibility to look out for others when you're in so much pain. He remembered the look of annoyance he threw at her. How could you say you're fine when you're anything but? Worry about yourself, damn it! Worry about your life!

She could see the person beneath it all. Underneath all that rotting is a girl who has her own wishes and dreams. Who hopes to travel, who likes views that make her heart flutter, who is fond of friendship and companionship just like anyone else.