Like A Syringe

-13-

We stayed in the park, and talk about what happened 8 years ago, for 3 hours. Exchanging gratitude, sadness, regrets and gladness. Tahimik lang siyang nakinig sa mga kwento at sinasabi ko sa kanya. Ruse even teased me after I told him everything, ako naman, hahampasin siya sa braso tapos iirap. Para akong nakalaya sa isang kulungan, gano'n ang naging pakiramdam ko.

Sinabi ko rin sa kanya na sinubukan ko siyang tawagan, i-text at sendan ng email. He said, he thought that he wouldn't need to keep on touch with me that's why he changed his number and account. Wala na kaming itinago, sinabi na namin ang lahat ng gusto naming sabihin.

"The moment that I leave, I stop from walking and waited for you." Nanlaki bigla ang mga mata ko, he's not giving me any look "Hinintay kita... Hinintay kita dahil akala ko hahabulin mo ako."

My heart shattered hearing that. Mapait na naman akong napangiti. Nag-amba ang mga luha ko sa pagbagsak pero napigilan ko.

"Actually, I don't care if you just used me. Wala akong pakialam, I'm willing to do anything for you, just to make you stay. I really love you, Crei."

Nag-unahan sa pagbagsak ang mga luha ko, nasasaktan ako para sa kanya. I didn't know that he still love me after what I did to him. I feel like I didn't deserve it.

"I want you to stay by my side forever, handa akong gawin ang lahat just to make you love me, at all cost." I just cried. I couldn't form a sentence nor say any words. How could I do that thing in this man?

"I- Im sorry..." Ruse use his thumb to get rid of my tears and embrace me. I felt his warmth and he let me cry in his chest.

"I love you, Ruse."

"I love you more, Crei." He stroke my hair.
Hinigpitan ko ang pagyakap sa kanya. I really love this man.

After that long time, Ruse said that he'll take me home because it's already 9 pm. Nakarating din naman kami kaagad. Pinapapasok ko siya sa loob but he's refusing, para raw makapagpahinga na ako. I lean in the door nang magpaalam na siya.

"I'm glad and happy to know everything." He mouthed and caressed my cheek. He pulled me out to give me a tight hug, and when we let go, he pecked my lips. I was smiling the whole time, he did the same. If this is a dream, I don't want to wake up anymore.

"Creixia Ermine Ferell." He called me as I was about to step in. He smiled and laid his hand on me, I look at his hand, then my eyes went to his face, confused.

"Wha--"

"Let's give it a shot again, can we?"

My heart starts racing like crazy, kasabay ng panlalaki ng mga mata ko. I sweetly smiled and energetically nodded as I took his hand. My eyes were sparkling and full of happiness.

"Ruse Alvaro." I also called him.

I want to start a new life and thing with him, gusto kong ipagpatuloy ang sinimulan namin dati. I want to try it again and give it a shot. I'd love to be with him. Again.

"Sure," I said "Let's give it a shot again."

***

"Oh My God, Crei! I'm so happy for the both of you!"

'Yan ang bungad sa'kin ni Leah pagkakita niya sa akin sa may lobby. Dahil hindi ko na matiis na hindi ichika sa kanya ang mga naganap kagabi, tinawagan ko nalang agad siya at kinuwento ang mga nangyari. Dumiretso kami sa office ko para doon magtilian dahil sa kilig at saya. Natigil lang kami ng may kumatok, Ruse smiled as he entered my office.