destiel oneshots

Help 2

When I woke up I catched cas starring at me.

"Good morning cas "

"Morning how do you feel?" Cas Said still staring at me

"Right now? I'm happy but stop starring at me it's creepy"

"That's good,okay" Cas stopped staring at me.

"So what do we do today?"

"First we have to talk about it" Cas said in a serious tone

I didn't want to talk about it

"Can't we just watch a movie? I heard there is a new batman movie out"

"You can't leave the bunker Dean"

"Why not?"

"Because you're gonna hurt yourself"

"What?" I asked

"It's saver for you trust me" he said

"Fine" i say

"Great" he left

I know he just wants me to feel better.but this is not easy.

He came back with pie in his hands

"Your bought pie? For breakfast?" Oh I love him for that. I really do I mean he brings me pie to breakfast it's like the dream I have about him but without him being in a cowboy custom

"Yes" he gave it to me
I toke it
"Oh I love you"

"Are you talking to me or the pie? He laughed

"To both of you" before I relazied I was saying
Cas made a face like he figured something out
"Wait-"
"Oh I mean-" I stuffed the pie in me

"Dean that's not healthy"

I ignore it

"Dean... I love you"
I spilled the pie out
"What"
"It's true dean"
"I already said it."

"Yeah now let's talk about you"
"Can't I just eat a pie in peace?"
"Fine then after the pie"

I eat the pie I toke my time because I didn't want to talk about it but I knew I wouldn't go away with out talking about it.

I finished my pie

Then cas began to talk

„Why did you do it?" He asked

„ i just...I don't know..I just needed to feel that I'm alive and not dreaming or dead. I needed to feel something. And my dad... he always said I was a failure he blamed me for my moms death he uh hit me sometimes one time Sam ran away and he beat me up pretty bad because I didn't watched over Sammy... so yeah I just maybe he's right you know? Maybe I'm a failure after all  maybe it's my fault mom died I mean I couldn't save Charlie,Benny,Jo, or Bobby  and more all of them are dead because I wasn't careful enough"

„You're not dreaming and you're not dead I promise you that and you're not a failure dean you dad was wrong for what he did to you your were just a kid he should have watched over him not you  it's not your fault your moms is died and it's not you fault the others died monsters killed them you couldn't do anything about it"

„How would you know?"
"I just know trust me"
"Okay"

"If you fell like doing it again please don't do that talk to me or watch a movie"
He made a pause
"And if you ever think about killing yourself again let me know. Maybe I can help you dean."

„Okay I promise I will tell you"

„So just for you to know I love you and I don't want you too fell bad"

„I love you too cas. I don't want to be a burden to you. I don't want you feel bad either"

"You're not a Burden"

„So can we watch a movie?"
"What you have in mind?"

I grinned

„The one with huckleberry in it"
„Again? We watched it like 5 times Dean!"
I decidede what to watch as long as I can't go outside!"
Cas was clearly annoyed
"Fine i Watch it one.last.time."
"Yay"

I put the dvd in the DVD player and we watched huckleberry (idk what the movie is named, or is it Tom Sawyer? I'm not sure)
I was happy
Cas was I think happy too but annoyed from the movie.

Now. I know he loves me too. That makes me happy.
I found happiness in him

I will get better