Vikings choose your fate Book 1

Chapter 53

The nostrils flared, Ivar sits back in his chair and stares at Sigurd, who shifts his weight from one foot to the other. "Sit down, Siggy" he hisses.

The fingers shooting through the air, Sigurd steps closer to the table. "Don't talk to her like that. You are just a little child, afraid. Siggy is not yours to command, she does not love you, neither does anyone else. Only mummy ever loved you-"

"Sigurd, stop" Your pleading eyes meet his, but his rage is too great for him to let go.

Scoffing, he pushes you aside. "You know, the only reason she played with you is because she was too small for us. Siggy pities you as much as we do, and you think the great Ivar can lead an army, you are nothing"

"Sigurd, that is enough" you scold him, but as you reach out to pull him into his seat, an axe lands in his chest and Sigurd tumbles over the platform, pulls the axe from his chest and aims at Ivar, but before he can reach him, Sigurd drops to the ground. "No, Sigurd" You run over to him, but his motionless body lays before you, the blood pooling beneath him. "Ivar, what did you do?" you yell out, "What did you do?" Tears run down your face as you spin around to face him, your hand reaching for the axe, but Hvitserk pulls you away, off the platform and into the monastery.

Holding you in his arms, he sits on a bench, his head on yours as he listens to your cries. His hands stroke your back while your face is pressed against his chest, the urge to scream arising in your chest.

Silent cries escape your mouth as you press yourself against Hvitserk, the touch of his hands on your back and arms, empathetic but firm as he fears you might attack Ivar again. It takes some time, but you compose yourself, brush off your tears and look at him. "He's gone" you sob, another tear rolling down your cheek.

"I know" Hvitserk, hugs you, his heartbeat almost as fast as yours.

Your body trembles as Ubbe enters the room and hugs you as well. His eyes filled with sadness, he sits beside you while Hvitserk leaves and soon after returns to tell you where they brought Sigurd's body.

With no one around, you stand before his body on the table. Blood has coloured his shirt brown and his eyes remain open. Your fingers brush over the lids, shutting them as you wish him eternal peace in Valhalla. A kiss lands on his lips and you hold your stomach, leaning your head against his. "I promised never to leave you, why did you not promise the same?"

For a while, you stand still, the eyes on him as he lays still, almost asleep. You walk around until you find a blanket and straw to place in a cloth. With those in hand, you lift his head and place the pillow underneath and the blanket over his chest and body, draping his arms across his chest as if he slept before the next battle. "I am sorry" you cry, placing one last kiss on his lips. "We should have left Kattegat a long time ago, go somewhere far away-" Your fingers brush over his hair as you speak, trembling but the more you brush, the more it calms you. "-build our own house. I would not want to farm, but we could have had a different life there. I am sorry. I hope to see you again in Valhalla"

Until late into the night, you remain by Sigurd's side, unable to let go. Hvitserk picks you up and carries you into one of the houses, placing you on a bed, but you walk back to Sigurd the second he left you.

Sigurd's cold skin pressed against your hand, you let go, wipe of the tear and grab the sword and some supplies you have gathered while all others celebrated.

At the stables, you pick one of the horses, tie the bag to the saddle and are about to open the gate when a noise makes you jump.

"I am sorry, Siggy. Please don't leave me" Through the ajar door, Ivar notices you enter the stables and follows you. He crawls closer, but you step back, unable to look at him. Filled with anger, your hand on the hilt of the dagger, you fight the thought f killing him as it would destroy you to lose him as well. "Please"

You fight the urge to jam your sword into his chest, but his eyes catch a glimpse of yours, red, puffed up, filled with grieve and anger.

"Siggy, please-"

"No, I trusted you. If you don't let me go now, one of us will have to die" You climb onto the horse and step towards the door, but Ivar crawls in front of the horse and looks up at you.

"Please, I didn't mean to. I can't lose you"

With empty eyes, you jump off the horse, your face so close to Ivar's you feel his breath on your skin. "The next time we will meet is the day of your death, Ivar, the boneless" You step past him, open the gate, swing yourself back onto the horse and gallop out of the stables, through the open gate and over the field into the woods. It does not matter where, but you want to be away from him, so far, you cannot even remember his face.

Tears roll over your face as you dash through the thicket, thorns cutting into your skin and tearing pieces of your clothes off. The wind bites off the tears and leaves behind trails of salt on your skin, yet you ride on until you are too tired to ride yourself, and let the horse guide the way.

Continue with Book 2 (not yet available)