Drowned but Not Out

Chapter 26

It's been three weeks since Meredith had sprained her wrist and she was due to get it checked out, but annoyingly, she had to wait until she could be escorted down to the main hospital from the psychiatric ward.

Meredith began to anxiously pace around her room on the ward. Neither Derek or Cristina could tell her who would be able to escort her as they didn't know who would be free considering surgeries, traumas and patients.

I know why they aren't coming.

They're probably avoiding me, sick of how much hassle I'm always causing.

Well, I'll show them! I don't need them.

I'll prove to them that I'm stronger and better than ever before, and they'll regret leaving me all on my own in this crappy psych ward.

The more Meredith paced back and forth, and the more she wound herself up by predicting the reasons why Derek or Cristina was late, the more she was ticcing.

"Meow, me-meow... cats go meow. Oh, stop it."

She jerked her neck to the side and flapped both her hands which stung her sprained, bandaged wrist.

Having annoyed herself by causing herself pain by flapping her hands, Meredith took a deep breath and stopped pacing. She stretched her arms out to rest against her window sill, and continued to take a few deep breaths.

Okay, inhale 1... 2... 3... 4... hold 1... 2... 3... 4... exhale 1... 2... 3... 4...

It took a couple of attempts before Meredith felt calm again.

Now she felt calm, she noticed her tics were less noticable and were mostly facial, muscle tics or blinking a lot.

"Mer, are you ready?"

Meredith spun around and saw Derek waiting for her in her doorway.

Suddenly, Meredith began to get super anxious again.

"Ye- I..I, um.. can.. you t-ell Bailey I can't come? Cancel it or something, please."

Derek moved his head to the side, studying Meredith closely.

Please, Derek. Just cancel the appointment.

"Mer, baby.."

"Please!" Meredith strained.

I can't go down there. Everyone knows what I've done and where I am at the moment. I can't. No no no!

Meredith crouched down and began to rock herself on the spot.

Derek immediately joined Meredith by her side and began to whisper in her ear to try to calm her down.

"Are you nervous, baby? To go down to the main hospital?" Derek asked after a few minutes.

Meredith didn't reply except for nodding her head while she was snuggled into Derek's chest.

"We'll do what Cristina did last time and go the quieter way round so there's less people to bump into."

"Would-would, Santa, you mind?"

"Of course I don't mind, baby. Anything to make this easier for you baby."

Meredith snuggled further into Derek's embrace as he kissed the top of her head.

"Let me know when you're ready to go."

I'm never ready to go.

After a few minutes, Derek got the impression that Meredith was still a little nervous so wouldn't say when she was ready so started prompting her to get ready.