I Hate You More

You're a Fucking Genius

Harlen

"So, when you're on the stand, you need to know exactly what you want to say," Darren coached, "if you second guess yourself for a second, the defense attorney will take advantage of that."

I nodded my head tiredly. At this point, I just wanted this shit to be over, whether my father went to jail or not.

"Got it."

"And try to maintain eye contact," Darren explained, "nervousness is a sign of weakness, and that won't go over well with your father's attorney or the jury."

"So, basically I've gone through this traumatic event, and now I'm not supposed to show any signs of trauma?"

"Uh," He rubbed the back of his neck, "yeah. Pretty much."

I let my head fall onto the table. We had met up to go over my testimony twice, and it was already exhausting me.

"Alright," He sighed, "I think we'll call it for today. Go home, get some rest, and enjoy your holiday. We'll meet up one more time before the trial. Just try to get your story straight."

I nodded my head and walked through the door he opened for me, and smiled at him.

"Does the first work for you?"

"Yeah I guess so. I'm just ready for this to be over."

"Alright. Have a nice holiday."

Darren sent me a grin, which I returned before setting my focus on Remington. My heart instantly squeezed at the sight of him. He had been with me for every minute of this process , and never complained once.

"How'd it go?" He smiled.

"It's getting a little easier," I sighed, "or- different I guess. I don't know if it will ever be easier."

Remington pulled me close, and kissed my forehead. This was something he did every time.

"Let's go." He smiled sympathetically.

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"So I was thinking like uh," I sat confused for a second as I thought out how to show the boys a guitar riff without playing it. I still had my cast on for two more weeks so, I couldn't exactly use a guitar at the moment, "I don't really know how to- ok so like this."

I hummed out a guitar riff and Sebastian and Emerson nodded their heads to it.

"And then the chorus is like." I smiled.

All these fucking voices in my head
Tell me I'm not good enough for them
They just leave me paranoid
Paranoid, paranoid again

"I love that," Remington chimed in, "keep going."

All these fucking voices in my head
Got me feeling insecure again
They just leave me paranoid
Paranoid, paranoid again
All these fucking voices

"Fuck yes," Emerson yelled in excitement, causing me to flinch, "sorry."

"It's ok," I gave him a small smile, "you guys don't have to worry about tiptoeing around me all of the time. You might scare me every now and then but, it's not your fault. I don't want you guys treating me like I'm a sheet of paper."

"Yes ma'am." Sebastian saluted pulling a chuckle from everyone.

"Alright," Remington laughed, "let's take it from the bridge."

"Ok," I nodded, "you sing it. I'm gonna try something."

I can't escape my thoughts
Are they real or dreams
Sirens in my head
Paranoia screams
I don't feel alone
Are they watching me?
Are they watching me?
Are you watching me?