"Move! Move! Move!" Sirens sounded through my ears, lights flashed and I could barely make out the silhouettes moving me to the wailing ambulance. To think he would've gotten so aggressive. To think I could actually calm him down alone. My arm hurt, my body hurt, and my eyes threatened to shut out the light forever, than everything went dark. My body felt cold, I felt broken, tainted, and lost. I felt numb, and all the voices in my head were slowly tuned out to nothing, than everything became silent.
Its like a blank empty box with no color and no sound. It's empty, endless, and you never know where you are, how you got here, why you're here, and who you are. There's no feeling, it's like you're floating, and going in some direction, but not moving at all. Everything stays still. So painstakingly still.
"Baby?" The first voice in my head. This wasn't the voice that shouted at me, this wasn't the voice that threatened for a bottle of beer. This was the voice that belonged to a fluffy brown haired, and green eyed man, that I so desperately tried to hang on to.
"Shane?" My throat was dry and I felt like I had eaten sandpaper.
"Hey, don't talk right now, I'll go get you some water." I felt his hand on my face but I couldn't see. I felt a surge of panic go through me, I couldn't see.
"Shane? Shane!" I felt like I was shaking. I felt paralyzed.
"Baby! Hey! Calm down." He grabbed my hands and pressed his forehead against mine, "You're okay, I'm right here." His voice soothed me enough that I started to breathe normally again.
"Why can't I-"
"It's temporary blindness. You'll be okay in a few moments." His fingers ran up and down my arms.
"Shane?"
"Yes?"
"Did I ever apologize for leaving?" I heard him suck in a breath.
"That's not important right now." I felt his hands brush against my forehead.
"I wanted to say sorry. I was just frustrated and I also thought that maybe you wanted to focus on your work more. I didn't want to distract you, now that I think about it was probably a terrible reason. I'm sorry, Shane. I just wanted you to finally get the job and-" I was cut off by a soft kiss to the lips and when I opened my eyes again color started to return.
"Yeah, well then I should apologize for letting you leave." His soft green eyes looked glossy and I lifted up a bandaged arm and ran my fingers through his hair. He grabbed my hand softly and ran his thumb over my knuckles. His scrubs were clinging to his body and he looked so exhausted.
"Shane-"
"You look as beautiful as the day I lost you, love." That's when the first tear came, it flowed down his cheek and before I could wipe it away it fell down his chin and onto the white blanket.
"I missed you. A lot." My voice cracked and then I was being held in his arms, softly, securely, and his scent filled my nose. I gripped onto his shirt and sniffled. I held onto him as if though I would lose him again.
"You're gonna be okay, I've got you now." He pulled my head in closer to his shoulder and held me, like he did all those times ago. The soft beeping of the machines was all that I heard besides his breath in my ear as we stayed in each other's arms.
"Mmm. Can you stay like this?" My voice was muffled and his body shook slightly when he chuckled. His soft hair tickled my ear as he pulled back and twirled the end of my hair and kissed my forehead before looking me back in the eye.
"For you love, I would do anything."
