Beginning of the end

Part 12 [August 1, 2021]

Life still felt unkind even when Blake sat on the couch watching intensely colorful cartoons with her daughter. Maybe it was a fluke that Blake could be a mother. She tried to stuff it all down, but she knew it was still escaping. She put on her bravest face for Zelda, and seemed quieter with Kiefer. It was lucky that all of the wedding planning had been done in advance, because this was not her year. She needed to clear her head in a big way.

Blake hoped that she could get some perspective with a walk. Maybe not perspective, but at least some peace. Kiefer had the day "off" but he was still "on." He needed to do some work on sketches, but he'd agreed to stay in the loft to do it. In theory he was giving Blake some company, but in practice it was just proximity and not any real attention. That was fine, she didn't deserve his attention right now. Zelda was down for a nap though, and when Blake asked if he'd be alright watching her, he joked that he hadn't lost the baby yet. Blake forced a smile and gave him a kiss before heading outside for a walk.

The Latina's head was not necessarily clearer, but it was slightly quieter in the moment. The buzz of people walking this way or that, and soft whirrs of a passing car helped to soften the nagging in her mind. She did not bring her iPod, instead listening to the noises around her. No music. A rare occasion for the musician. She listened to music in the car, she sang to Zelda, she hummed and created tunes as she went about just about any activity in her day. The buzz of life being lived and errands being run was usually drowned out by louder sounds. She needed a bit of quiet.

Twenty minutes into the walk, Blake found herself in a much more audible area. Music hit her ears all of a sudden. Not the tease of a single second out a passing car's window, or the coming and going volume of someone playing music from their phone as they jogged. Live music. Blake quickly identified the busker and approached.

A woman who Blake would assume to be still in high school was sitting there on a portable stool. A tambourine hung from her hip, attached but not currently in use. Its chiming was heard from a pre-recorded player resting on box. Inside the box was a bowl that Blake could assume held her tips. In her hands was an acoustic guitar, strumming to an unfamiliar song. Her voice was soft, rich, but also high. Feminine and soft, and distinctly girly, if Blake were going to pick just one word. It made her seem even younger. Sitting there she wore pink scalloped shorts and a white ribbed crop top. Her nails were short, but French tipped with the glossy sheen of someone who cared if they looked like they cared. She cared. Blake decided that she was doing a good job of it too. She looked nothing like Blake.

Blake was currently wearing some black and white checkered converse, black fishnets all the way up over underwear that would be seen by no one else. Tattered gray jeans with holes that showed tan skin and those nets beneath. An obviously oversized white shirt with a band logo across the front in black, and short black fingerless gloves on her fingers. Her hair was in a low pony, covering her neck tattoo, but not her hot pink choker. Her black hair and mild, earthy toned makeup was subtler than usual, but not out of character. This girl wore white and the softest pink. She had one pinky ring and a long delicate chain with a little butterfly at the end. Strappy brown sandals, long fair legs, and soft strawberry blonde hair falling in waves just barely brushing against her shoulders. If Blake was a playful imp, this girl was a cheerful sprite. She looked delicate, and wholesome.

She sang lyrics about "honeysuckle kisses" and "cherry-blossom blush." Blake still stood there watching. She didn't have much by way of tips though, and she felt guilty enjoying a performance without contributing to the artist. She walked into a corner store, getting a candy bar, and some cash back. Once outside, a new song had started. This one spoke of "tripping laces, tempting me to fall for you" and "school boy, stay in grade school." A different tone. It was sassier, faster. Blake smiled and set a twenty in the bowl before moving away. Out of the way, so she wasn't a distraction. The song wrapped soon after, and the girl took a break. She looked in her bowl, and then to Blake.

"Oh, hey, thanks," she said, smiling with teeth so perfect they made Blake feel a bit inadequate. Her accent was easily northern California, if Blake was guessing. She guessed it. Probably somewhere with snow, considering her complexion. Maybe, maybe not.

"No problem. Those were pretty songs. Is the tambourine track from you?" A few people passed by, but no one bothered to stop and stare.

"Yeah," she smiled still. She'd looked relaxed, but serious while she played. Now she looked almost entirely carefree. "I decide on some songs and record the tambourine before I play. It makes it more interactive, if people stick around."

"That's a cool move," Blake praised, nodding. She should go, right? "Don't let me interrupt you."

"Its fine. I should probably take a break and get a drink before I get back too it. The busy part is over anyway. I might call it a day."

"Do you... do this very often?" Blake realized that it had been a while since she stopped to listen to a busker. Months, maybe. She had not seen Suho out playing, but most importantly she just hadn't stopped. There were lots of them around, but she hadn't been out to hear them. Her own bubble of sadness. She bit her lip and tried not to show the remorse.

"Oh yeah. A few days a week if I'm busy. I have to get my name out there, right?" She laughed. Very light, very charming. Very girly. "Speaking of. I'm Viv Huff. Feel free to google it. You might get lucky. Don't try Vivian Huff, because that will lead you to the woman who sews stuffed bunnies. Very cute though," she said, still smiling.

Self promotion. Blake wasn't the best at that. "Viv Huff, not Vivian Huff. Got it."

"Well, I am Vivian, but Viv for the sake of searches. Professional distinction. You know?"

"Claro que si," Blake nodded. She did indeed know that. "My professional name is Blake G. So I..." The girl's eyes had widened a moment after Blake said her name. Why? Blake continued though, "I know a bit about name separation." The girl was nodding, smiling more with her eyes, but her brilliant smile was hidden behind her lips now. "Anyway, it was nice meeting you, Viv. I hope I run into you busking again later." She departed a bit too quickly. She felt her anxiety poking its head out. She wasn't sure why. Talking. Happy people. She wanted to get back to Zelda. She'd enjoyed the music though. She would be by again soon.