IT AIN'T A LOVE STORY

Life is diabolical!!! He said with a sigh, after chewing his teeth in anger.In fact, it is something that you have to undergo. You have to be a snob once in a while to outsmart the uneasy challenges. I replied laughing as if I was some genius who understand life like a great Greekphilosopher.As we strolled into the city arguing and grinning unaware of our uncertain future. We entered into the book store in hope to buy a book of Marquez of whom I was a great fan of. He introduced magicalrealism to me. His writing was the thing that made me look into life as an easier task. There at that moment I laid my eyes on something that stopped time for me. A beauty I never had met, a hand I never had held, a heart I never had known. I stared until she disappeared from my vision.

Dibya mocking me, patted on my back and chimed in a slow voice "Here starts another unrequited love".

Dibya was now free of his anger for it was a silly fork he had to choose. I giggled but my heart snapped the moment like I used to store photos of greats in my slam book.I grabbed a book called "100 years of solitude" and rushed to the counter to pay and collect informationabout her.Amisha, the cashier told me; that was her name and told me that she was their frequent customer.

Theday passed and I began visiting the book store regularly not to fit my interest but just to gaze her swapping through the books. It was nevertheless an opportunity for me to introduce myself but my blood hits different. Conundrums speaks to me more than simple life. It's the price that comes being an introvert.Days passed until it was the day of Holi; the festival of colors and I was passing by our colony hiding my faces in order to save myself from water balloons and it occurred in a jolt. I never knew she lived two streets after me until that day when I saw her covered in various color on a white kurti with red color on her cheek. I was awestruck as if she was an enchantress. A moment to behold and my heart thumped faster for now it was difficult to notice her to be an extrovert and socializing one.

That day, when I met Dibya, I put my thoughts out and for the sake of idiocy or what he laughed out loud.I ignored him and I went out do the scariest thing of my life. I laid out plans to be a man of society and have impact rather than glory for greater good. Outwitted in an unprecedented way I began attending clubs in college that were not for geeks. Going to cool boys' hub and mimicking teachers and laying out tardy thoughts on others. I hated it but it had to be done for the sake of heart. Viraj-the guy who was popular in our college among girls for being an athlete and a charmer. It is not that I disliked sport; it is the aftermath what I disliked. wild celebrations and hard high fives! (It always disgusted me).

Like it or not after a month or two I was one of the most savage on the group. I was embarking like a roast king from down the ash.Now life was odd. I began to face trouble even in the tiny decisions of my life. Now I had trouble choosing a book to read whereas earlier I was a critique. I was way out of my nature. I was defying universe just to get the girl. Perhaps, it is like the quote from the book "the perks of the wallflower" which goes like "we accept the love we think we deserve".

It was winter now...About 6 months have gone and we had just finished our exams and on one fine morning when I met Dibya on my way to class he said "Brother you have gone mad. You are becoming something that will have the most disastrous impact on your life" and at the spark of time I pushed him into the lawn. Grabbed his color and said "Do not teach philosophy to me. I know it better than you. "You are like a frog who cannot accept that your fellow brother is going out of well for getting a better life" and I went out to class in high dudgeon. That's it, it was the fight that cost me my best friend. That winter however I started dating Amisha. It was great at first. I had achieved my dreams. Getting good grades and having a girl I love. It was beautiful until at night while sleeping I began questioning myself. An emotion of hollowness developed inside me.

Nightmares of ghastly events frightened me and started building an insomniac out of me.I had lost everyone. I feel alone and lost in the desolate city. There was a small village beyond the great path. The path was so familiar that I ran up and peeked into the inn to find its carnage in a shell. It was hard to believe my skeleton and pinkish calcified skin. I had died and buried. In the meanwhile, as I stare blankly into distance as the light disappears from the eyes, watching the hopes of a showdown grow dimmer and smaller in the distance. "Could not bear to see me smile, could you?" I screamed at the ceiling fan waking up from the circumstantial and petrified dream.

My brain showed me my argument with Dibya in loop every night. Conclusion to point out I mumbled in sleep with tears in my eyes "I have lost myself to win". The choice now was difficult. The fight resulted in losing my best friend. Now I mourn but I do not know on what I am lamenting! was it losing him or my loneliness.

Solitude now was my common entrance to life. Genius and greats say solitude brings solace to heart and makes you wander over your hidden potentials. I agree with them but they never said the pain you have to resist while in it. Sometimes you feel as if you are lone man on a secluded planet with all resources but none to use. Inception of a new morning establishes. I realized in a hard way that Dibya was my canary and I can never leave him behind. I have to have him with my side all the time to have sanity and melody in life. But time had other plans. I now only had to live with his memories concealing his absencethrough the grass filled roads