from Time to Time | Lucius Malfoy

30 years ago...

1991

"Lucius, I..." I wanted to say something but actually I didn't know what. Nothing seemed appropriate to me in this situation. Nothing would have undone the damage I caused here 30 years ago. His reaction was relatively good, I would have screamed and thrown things at me if I were him, but Lucius was different. Much calmer. Just like his father.

I was almost crushed by two strong arms, he was holding me so tightly. His harsh perfume filled my nostrils. Yes, he had grown up, but oddly enough, to me he was still this little boy with his nose running from the cold. His hair felt silky soft against my cheek. When we last hugged him, he was just about halfway up my waist and now he was a head taller than me.

"Don't say anything, it's all right," his husky voice broke the silence. My answer was a tentative nod. I had no idea how he or I would explain this to his wife or anyone else, it was too strange even for our world. Severus thought I was stupid and didn't really understand how I could feel that way. He was somehow suspicious of the whole story, understandably so.

Lucius slowly released me. His eyes stared into mine. "I think you owe me an explanation. And so does Severus." "Severus knows, I told him this morning... as best I could. You can't fit a whole year in an hour. Lucius, I want you to know that this... all of this. .. that wasn't intentional. I didn't want to hurt you. Really not.", the tears ran down my cheeks, with a trembling voice I tried to find the right words, but the person opposite didn't seem to hear me at all.

He was completely fixated on me and couldn't believe it. It didn't fit in his head, how was this all possible? How could she look like 30 years ago? How could she be standing here and at the same time have been there for him in his childhood? He sighed. Eventually she was gone...

"Why didn't you come back? Why didn't you leave a message?" He blurted out. Actually he was angry, his upbringing didn't allow him to just burst out and scream but he would have loved to do it right now.

His face flushed with anger. You could see his inner struggle. "How was I supposed to do that, Lu? Just come back? After a month? Or 3? Or a year? Or after 5?" Lucius swallowed. "You could have brought me to you." His words were very soft, barely audible. Obviously the wound I left was very big and very deep and still not healed after 30 years. "Lu... where are you going? Here? You would be my child now... You would not have married, had a child, lived a life-" I started but was interrupted. "Yes. But I would have been loved. I would have been a happy child. I would have been allowed to make decisions. Narcissa would have been married to someone else and-" he gulped. Draco? Draco would probably be another man's son then. Or not even born yet. Or maybe he would never have been born. He swallowed again. Everything sucks. "I'm tired," he whispered and walked over to a sofa, sat down and rubbed his face.

"I have no idea why you're here again but... I don't know... I mean... I missed you..." his murmur warmed my heart. Yes, I missed him too. A lot. I sat down next to him and slowly exhaled. "I'd like to...spend time with you..." I looked at him and smiled. "Yes, I would like that too, Lu." His smile almost made me laugh, there he was again, the little boy. Maybe everything would be fine after all.

"You're kidding me." Narcissa downed her third glass of cognac. 20 minutes ago she had switched to alcohol. The story Severus had told her was too dubious. "His nanny? You're lying. Just say she was one of his former playmates and-" - "No, Narcissa. I'm not lying, why should I? She just told me this morning herself!" Severus simply cut her off. Interrupting Narcissa was difficult, the torrent of words pouring out of her mouth was enormous. However, this time it was simply necessary. She had to listen to him and, above all, believe him. He wasn't lying, he wasn't tricking her, it was the plain truth, strange as it sounded.

"So... your 26 year old girlfriend was my almost 40 year old husband's nanny 1 year ago. When he was 7. And he called her Mom. Because he loved her so much. So 30 years ago?" Narcissa's brain still couldn't process the information. "Yes." Her childhood friend's answer was brief. "Oh, that's nonsense! He fucked her, that's what's going on. And you still believe all that nonsense." Severus rolled his eyes, this woman was driving him insane! Sometimes he understood Lucius when he just left the house for days and didn't tell his wife where he was going, just to be alone and not have her around him. This constant questioning and this rattling breath, these strange noises she made and how she pursed her lips. tiresome. Annoying. "Severus? Are you actually listening to me?" "What? Yes. No, sorry, what did you say?" Narcissa leaned closer to him and almost whispered. "I asked you if it couldn't be that she wants to trick us all? A con artist?" Now that was enough for him.

"Narcissa, are you serious? What's in it for her other than an annoying daughter-in-law?" "WHAT!? Pah!" Narcissa crossed her arms over her chest and pouted. How dare he? He would soon see what kind of girl Katharina or whatever was. She would convict them, red-handed. This person was up to something. Narcissa didn't know exactly what it was yet, but she would find out. And Lucius would thank her for that. He would look at her and smile and thank her a thousand times over and tell her that only she could be smart enough to convict this girl. Yes, that would be it. This is how she would do it. Somehow.