I had counseling yesterday.
you knew it.
we knew it.
I was supposed to be there at 4.
we were still at school at 3:50, it's 20 minutes away.
of course I wouldn't have made it.
but I did something I shouldn't have done.
we shouldn't have done.
I tried to kiss you. but you teased me. as any dominant person would do.
I didn't ask this time though. circumstances have changed. but then you kissed me.
of course, I bit your lip. just a little bit of blood, you said.
your mom took me there. we talked on the short ride. I like that family. it was really good.
you texted me later. saying it was wrong, and it shouldn't have happened. that you need to get better before a relationship. but of course you'd always love me.
I agreed. I shouldn't have done it. we shouldn't have done it.
then we skyped. it was fun. as it always it. oh, Zach, he's so cute.
but then you got sad again.
oh how I try to make you happy.
I woke up from messages from you. 8, I think. talking about me and how he loves me. which I do too. but he doesn't believe me.
I was with him today. he was really good. and happy. but he had to go home. and he was happy no more. it's awful. I feel so bad for him.
but I knew not to kiss him. like I did yesterday. and I didn't. I wanted to. so bad.
I guess we're remotely in love. although I struggle to believe love is real.
but it's best for us to not be together.
I'm just blabbing. silly teenager with silly infatuations.
