Beacon to Some Food

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You
Hey Cam?
Can you help me with the
chem homework?
Problem 5?

Cam?
Mr. Cobbwell?

You
Yeah

Cam?
Hate to break it to you
I'm not Cam
However, I have cobweb
so I can help you!

You
Thanks Mr. Stranger

Not Cam
Anytime
Enter chemistry answer
here

You
THANKS!!
wait are you a Mr.?
I feel bad if you aren't

Not Cam
I am indeed a Mr.
What are you?

You
A Ms.

Mr. Not Cam
Thank you

You
Anytime Mr. Not Cam

Mr. Not Cam
I'll take you up on that
Ms. Random Number

~~~at midnight ~~~

Mr. Not Cam
Ned HWLP!!

You
This is a terrible time to say
I'm not Ned, right?

Mr. Not Cam
Congrats Ms. Random Number
You have been upgraded
to Ms. Not Ned
Now please send me a YouTube
video on how to stitch a bullet
wound

You
Insert link
Why are you up at midnight?

Mr. Not Cam
Work

You
Dam, that must suck

Mr. Not Cam
I love what I do so not really
Why are you up?

You
I'm eating the healthiest food I
possibly can

YouI'm eating the healthiest food I possibly can

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Mr. Not Cam
Man, that looks good

You
It is
You think if I make a second
one and point a beacon to the
sky, god will answer my prayers
and I'll meet Spiderman

Mr. Not Cam
Absolutely definitely yes

Wait, I just realized how much
there is to unpack in that sentence

You
Okay I did it
You better be right
Also, yes, lol, but we don't
question it

Now, I know what you're thinking. You did not just make a second sugar packed whatever, point a beacon the the sky with an open window, right? Well, guess again mother fuckers cuz I totally did. Honestly if Spiderman doesn't come, I'll just eat it myself. Who needs sleep when you can sugar rush?

I sit on my phone, on the kitchen counter for a bit. I hoped and prayed to God that one of pets didn't get out.

I hear a thump and look up. HOLY SHIT!!! Mr. Not Cam was right. Spiderman came!

"You know you just said that out loud right?" he asks.

"Welp, lovely meeting you too. Imma go die in a corner," I shrug.

"Aw please don't. I was told you had a crazy sugar filled thing," he sighs.

"I do," I say handing it to him.

"Oh yeah! Thank you!!" he says, the smile so prevelant on his voice. He lifts his mask up and starts to eat.

"So, Mr. Not Cam? Who's he?" Spiderman asks after a bit.

"Oh this dude I texted after my friend gave me a wrong number," I explain.

He laughs. "Do you know if the random dudes a pedo?"

"Uh, no," I realize.

"Well you should figure that out," he suggests.

"You're right," I say, marveling in my own stupidity. "Well he knew my chemistry teacher's homework so I really don't think he is one."

"Still check. Lovely speaking to you, miss," he starts to leave.

"Wait don't you know him?" I ask. "I mean, how else would you know I had food for you?"

He looks panicked for all about one second. "I'm just trying to teach internet safety."

"Oh, fair. Good night! Don't get hurt. And get that wound checked out," I say pointing to it.

"I will, thank you miss. Have a good night," he says, climbing out the window and shooting a web. Wow! I had a man sneak in through the window and back out it. When did my life become a cringy teen movie?

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