Midnight

Chapter Twenty-Eight

He had met her again. It was the third time, after that night she had come to his door to give him a gift he would treasure. He didn't know how much time he had held her into his arms, after he spoke her name and felt her tense for a second. He didn't care how it seemed in that moment as his only thought was to stay there with her in the middle of the night, appropriate as their meetings mostly held in this hour. When the moon had rose and his demons came to life. Yet there were no voices when she was there. He observed later how he believed him to be the one that protected her from her guilt, but eventually she brought the light into his house. Into him. How he began to wake up at her knock on his door, and then before that, waiting for the sound to announce her arrival. How he calmed when it did.
He thought about the days she decided she didn't want to train and instead of finding it meaningless, he waited to see how they would spent their hours together. He remembered the time when she had brought sweets from a shop she loved and the cinnamon had filled the air along with her scent. They stayed inside that day. She insisted for him to try and he argued that he wouldn't. How he caved under her suggestion, because her mouth stuffed with one, and she seemed delighted. How she laughed when his expression turned sour on the one bite he took and a passing thought told him that it worth it. When they discussed the mission they were under and he listened to her proposals about their training, about what they should do. How her hand brought her hair behind her ear and her expression remained focused when she explained something and Sasuke felt like it didn't matter if they had the mission or not. He thought when that day during training, she said that he smelled different than usual. When she came closer but this time he didn't back down instead he let her face to be inches away from his chest. She said his scent was the lighting that hit the world. He had dreamt Itachi that morning. When an afternoon she came and she wore that blouse, black with red edges, they had bought when her clothes were wet in that village that he couldn't recall its name. That he thought now how well it suit her, but he said that she looked like an Uchiha instead. How her eyes searched with a slight surprise to see if he meant it as a good or a bad thing but she couldn't find her answer because he himself didn't know. She never wore it again and he believed it was out of fear. He never dared to ask her.
He recalled how she stayed in his embrance not pushing him away, not saying a word that would break the fragile moment. Because Hinata Hyuga always helped the people in need. And he was a drowning man. He was sure she felt it, his despair as he held her and she wouldn't push him away. That was her essence.
He remembered how her breath touched his shoulder, his eyes closed as his face was on the side of her head as to saviour the moment of the departure. That was what it was essentially. He was saying his goodbye. And because he was always a selfish bastard, he wanted to feel her one last time, before she would be lost in the embrace of another, more suited for her.
He let her go when his name escaped her lips. Because it would soil the moment when she expressed her uneasyness. Because he would have caused it. Because he liked how it sounded. Because he would kiss her again. He said a goodnight and he meant a goodbye, closing the door before she could respond.
His eyes lifted from her when she returned his gaze and moved to Sakura who sat beside her. He could control it now, his face not betraying any emotions when Naruto was close to her, closer than Sasuke himself wanted him to be. When she laughed on a silly joke he would make, when she looked directly at Sasuke and smiled. He kept his mask as nothing would crack it, fearless and cold as he had always been.
Yet he was scared. That his mask would fall and shutter, that Naruto would know, that everyone would see. And he wasn't sure that he would forgive him this time.
He was scared that she would call him by his family name again, to create the distance that he himself couldn't.
He was absolutely terrified of the day he would see the blonde's lips touching hers and she would smile and laugh, her cheeks pink from another's mans gaze.
"So..." Yamanaka spoke on his side.
She had arrived late and the seat next to him was the only one left.
"I thought you would have at least hook up."
He turned his head slightly. She had drunk two more drinks than him even if she came after. She had control over her actions, it was evident, but the alcohol made her more relaxed and let her tongue loose.
He returned to his previous occupation. The woman had proven herself useful the day they were searching for Hyuga but she still wasn't pleasant. He watched as Sakura leaned closer to the blue haired woman as if to tell her a secret.
"But you really don't want her at all." The voice of the blonde concluded.
He took a sip from his glass.
"Pity." She added before she mimicked him. "For all three of you." Her fingers made a round move.
He panicked at first, thinking that the woman had discovered somehow about him. About her. Her finger stopped at the other blonde and Sasuke relaxed.
"He keeps tailing after her and she after you."
"Naruto doesn't want Sakura. Not anymore." His voice more rough than it needed.
"Oh? Do you know something?" She said playfully.
He didn't answer. Yamanaka moved her drink at her hand, not care to bring it to her lips.
"It will destroy her." Her tone softer, touched by a colour of concern. "But maybe that is what she needs."