I Just Can't Do It Anymore

Chapter 1

Megan's POV

*dream*

"Megan??" His morning voice rang into my ears.

"What time is it?" I asked the beautiful boy laying next to me. I just didn't want to get up yet. I could just lay in his arms forever.

"12 pm.. And Liam just told me that Niall is eating out our flat fridge... So..." He trailed. Oh yeah. We own a flat together. We're engaged actually. I know we're young, but we are so intriguingly in love.

"Why is that boy in our kitchen? Did he already go through the 12 bags of crisps at his own house?" I asked jokingly. His deep chuckle just made my heart flutter. I never knew that Harry, my first true love, could make me feel so.... Tingly? Yeah.

"Come on, love. Before Louis wakes us up..." He said. We both shivered in unison thinking about the last time my brother woke us the "lovebirds" up. It wasn't pleasant.

"Carry me?" I asked him sweetly. I knew I could walk, but when his back muscles flex into my flat stomach, it makes me have the most electrified sensation ever. He just walked over to the bed and grabbed me onto his back.

My Mr. Tough guy. He's all mine. I'm all his. And we love each other. Isn't that enough.....

*end dream*

"Mummmmmmmmmmy!" My toddler screamed for what... The 8th time just this minute. Not that I don't love Julie, but she just woke me up from one of my best dreams from the past. Ahhh. The past. How I wish I was still there. In his arms- MEGAN! Get a hold of yourself! He is not worth it!! Oh how I wish he was.

"Yes sweetie?" I asked my sweet girl twirling my fingers throughout her dark curly locks. His dark curly locks. I looked into her deep green eyes and saw him. The life ruiner that I can't help but wish for everyday. The one that screwed me so badly, yet makes me want more. More of his love. His kisses. All of it. All of him.

"Whewe is muyyy daddy?" She asked in her baby voice. The question. The one I have dreaded ever since she learned how to talk. Every Father's Day. Every time his face alone comes on the TV and when his angelic voice comes on the radio. Just every time I say her name. Julie Elizabeth Styles. Yep! I gave her his last name. He was my fiancé. But he still doesn't know he has a 2 year old daughter.

"You know sweetie, if I honestly knew, I promise you'd be the first person I'd tell. But I don't know." I said sadly kissing her forehead.

"Meg??!?!" My best friend, Blair's voice rang out to me from the kitchen.

"Yeahhhhhh?!?!" I called back grabbing Julie and walking down the hall. My best friend and I share a flat here in London because it just makes things easier.

When I walked into the kitchen I was astounded by the sight that was in front of me. I passed Jules to Blair before freaking out.

"LOUIS!!!!" I screamed jumping into my older brothers outstretched arms. He spun me around in circles for what felt like hours. Blair and Lou have been there through it all for me. Something that Harry should've done. NO! I will not let him ruin my day.

"I missed you!!!" He said kissing my forehead while putting me down. "And you! You never gave me my hello hug and kiss!" He said pointing at his niece. She planted a sloppy kiss on his cheek and squeezed him as hard as her body would allow.

"I mishhhhed you ucewl Louissss!" She said happily. I love when they are together.

"Blair would you please watch Jules for today so I can bring my favorite sister out??" He asked her with his puppy dog eyes. No one can resist those. And surely, she caved.

"Fine!" She said giving in.

"Okay! Now Meg, go get ready!" He said pushing me up the stairs.

Since I washed my hair last night, I just left it in it's natural waves. I grabbed a pair of short jean shorts and a flow top. I was surprisingly skinny because I worked off my baby fat. I may be an 18 year old mother of the 2 year old, but I'm still an 18 year old. I grabbed my white toms, my side coach bag, aviator sunglasses, and my iPhone 5.

"Alright loser! I'm ready! I'm here your life just got better!" I yelled to my now pouting brother.

"Bye baby!" I yelled to my precious daughter while walking out with Lou. As he started the engine of his very expensive car, I was starting to get curious where he was taking me.

"So bro, where we goingggg?" I asked in a child's voice.

"To the one direction mansion." He said completely serious. The lump that formed in my throat was nothing compared to the fact that my lungs were crashing down. My mind was blank on if I had to see Harry again. Lou noticed my tense body and realized my dilemma.

"Oh god! Meg! No! Don't freak out! He won't be there!!" He said pulling into a house I used to know so well.

"Oh okay. He won't be there?" I asked him.

"Yeah he was supposed to already be gone." He said with a smile on his face. I'm finally going to see my best friends again! Yay! They know about Julie and Harry, but with him always there 24/7, they never really get to see her.

I walked up to door and opened it leaving Lou to lock the car. As I started to walk through the door, I felt myself run into someone's chest. And then, he just fell on top of me.

I saw the curls and could've spotted those green eyes from miles away. I'm under my ex fiancé. Can you say awkward?

"Meg?" He said disbelievingly and mostly to himself. I pushed him off of me with all I had and gave my brother a disappointed look before running off. Off into the town that I know by heart, but right now, I have no idea where I am and what I'm doing. My mind has been invaded with memories of my past. And I can't stop the tears for the life of me.

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Comment and vote please! It's my first fanfic and I want to know if I'm doing a good job! ~lousbumm210 xx